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Headlines & Links For Thursday, February 12th, 2009.

FOX’S SUNDAY NIGHT CHARACTERS GET ANIMATED WITH THE ONES THEY LOVE THIS VALENTINE’S DAY (Read More)

WIFE SWAP CELEBRATES ITS 100TH EPISODE WITH THE ULTIMATE SWAP (Read More)

CAROL BURNETT TO GUEST STAR ON NBC'S "LAW & ORDER: SPECIAL VICTIMS UNIT" TUESDAY, MARCH 17 10 PM ET/PT (Read More)

A SPECIAL EDITION OF 20/20 -- SIEGFRIED & ROY: THE MAGIC RETURNS (Read More)

LET "CUPID" HELP YOU SHARE THE LOVE WITH SPECIAL VALENTINE'S DAY TEXTS FROM YOU OR YOUR LOVED ONES       (Read More)

PHIL CAREY ON ABC'S "ONE LIFE TO LIVE," PASSES AWAY       (Read More)

NBC TO AIR NEW LIFE-CHANGING ALTERNATIVE SERIES FEATURING BESTSELLING AUTHOR AND CHANGE EXPERT TONY ROBBINS       (Read More)

NOMINATIONS ANNOUNCED FOR THE "44TH ANNUAL ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS," TO BE BROADCAST LIVE FROM LAS VEGAS SUNDAY, APRIL 5 ON CBS       (Read More)

NBC ANNOUNCES COMEDIAN NICK CANNON AS HOST OF 'AMERICA'S GOT TALENT' WHEN HIT TALENT-COMPETITION SERIES RETURNS THIS SUMMER       (Read More)

DANIEL BARNZ TO DIRECT "BEASTLY" FOR CBS FILMS       (Read More)

NBC'S HIT WEIGHT-LOSS SERIES 'THE BIGGEST LOSER' LAUNCHING NATIONWIDE, 14-CITY SEARCH FOR NEW CONTESTANTS AND CERTIFIED TRAINERS       (Read More)

ANNA PAQUIN STARS IN "THE COURAGEOUS HEART OF IRENA SENDLER," A NEW "HALLMARK HALL OF FAME" PRESENTATION FOR AIR SUNDAY, APRIL 19 ON CBS       (Read More)

LISTINGS FOR NBC'S 'SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE'       (Read More)

UPCOMING GUESTS ON THE "LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN"       (Read More)

UPCOMING GUESTS ON "THE LATE LATE SHOW with CRAIG FERGUSON"       (Read More)

LISTINGS FOR 'LAST CALL WITH CARSON DALY'       (Read More)

QUOTABLES FROM 'S.N.L'S' 'WEEKEND UPDATE WITH SETH MEYERS'       (Read More)

THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Messages Left on Alex Rodriguez's Answering Machine"       (Read More)

THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Reasons I'm Looking Forward to the Grammy Awards"       (Read More)

THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Michael Phelps Excuses"       (Read More)

FOX’S SUNDAY NIGHT CHARACTERS GET ANIMATED WITH THE ONES THEY LOVE THIS VALENTINE’S DAY

Los Angeles, Ca., February 9th, 2009.          Flowers, heart-shaped boxes of chocolates and romantic dinners might be the most popular gifts, but FOX’s Sunday night animated characters reveal what they think makes for the perfect Valentine’s Day! Make a special date with all-new episodes of THE SIMPSONS, KING OF THE HILL, FAMILY GUY and AMERICAN DAD this Sunday, Feb. 15 on FOX.

THE SIMPSONS (8:00-8:30 PM ET/PT)

Homer Simpson: I’d like to take my sweetheart Marge out wherever she wants to go – as long as it isn’t one of those restaurants that charge you $200 because they know they got you trapped. Oh, yeah, and if Santa is reading this, I also want a new bike.

Marge Simpson: Chocolates and some time with my dream man: Mr. Clean. (Because sometimes chocolates leave stains!)

Lisa Simpson: I’d like all the commercialization of romance to stop. No more wasteful cards, delivery of chocolates or unnecessary cutting of healthy flowers. Unless the boy that plays trumpet in the band wants to send me something. Then I guess it might be okay.

Bart Simpson: My Valentine’s Day wish is for my sister. I’d like her to get the Malibu Stacy Sweetheart doll she wants. She’s wanted it for a long time, and it would make her really happy. All I want for myself is five minutes alone with Lisa’s doll to roll it in hamburger and feed it to the dog. Happy Valentine’s Day!

Moe Szyslak: For Valentine’s Day, I’d like any sort of human contact – a smile, a wink, a phone call – even a wrong number; I’ll take anything. If I don’t get nothing, that’ll be me, the creep across the street, giving you the eye. America, you’ve been warned.

KING OF THE HILL (8:30-9:00 PM ET/PT)

Hank Hill: My perfect Valentine’s Day would be spent at work selling propane. The day would end before it turns into Valentine’s night with all the crowded restaurants, overpriced roses and creepy public kissing.

Peggy Hill: My perfect Valentine’s Day is for Hank to buy me two dozen red roses and take me to a popular restaurant where I can – without shame or restraint – show the world just how much I love him.

Bobby Hill: I’m going to do some social networking and see if I can track down a certain plastic head I used to date.

FAMILY GUY (9:00-9:30 PM ET/PT)

Peter Griffin: Every Valentine’s Day Lois promises me one sexual fantasy. This year I am choosing sex in a helicopter while reporting local traffic.

Lois Griffin: The perfect gift would probably be about 6’6” and have strong, calloused hands.

Brian Griffin: What anyone would want on this holiday: a good girl. But seriously, I’ll take either that or Beggin’ Strips.

Stewie Griffin: You can just give me more Matt Lauer in the morning. Seriously, who needs coffee when you can flip on the television and get yourself a Venti Matt with extra foam?!?

AMERICAN DAD (9:30-10:00 PM ET/PT)

Stan Smith: The perfect Valentine’s Day gift? A new president. This guy is already blowing it.

Francine Smith: A heart-shaped toilet seat that remembers to put itself down.

Hayley Smith: A chocolate-covered exit strategy from Iraq.

Steve Smith: On Valentine’s Day, I like to show the ladies my C3P-Oh face!

Roger Smith: An orgasm. Who’s with me, ladies?

Klaus Smith: A blow fish. Get it? Get it? You get it!

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WIFE SWAP CELEBRATES ITS 100TH EPISODE WITH THE ULTIMATE SWAP

Los Angeles, Ca., February 9th, 2009.          "Wife Swap," the critically-acclaimed unscripted reality show that takes us into the intimate heart of the American family home, premiered in the United States in 2004. In the show, two very different families take part in a two-week long challenge: the wives exchange husbands, children and lives (but not bedrooms) to discover what it's like to live in another woman's shoes. From city dwellers to country folk, from clowns to pirates, 198 remarkable families from across the U.S. have participated in this mind-blowing experiment and seen their lives changed forever.

In October 2008, ABC asked viewers to help celebrate the 100th episode by voting for favorite families from past episodes whom they'd like to see swap lives again. From a pool of 24 past families, ABC viewers from across the country went to ABC.com and picked their favorite four families. Now it's finally time to announce which two families were chosen by the producers to participate in the 100th episode's ultimate "Wife Swap":

The families that have been chosen for the 100th episode swap are the storm-chasing, science-obsessed Heene family from Colorado and the psychic, performing arts-loving Silvers from Florida.

When the Heene family aren't chasing storms, they devote their time to scientific experiments that include looking for extraterrestrials and building a research-gathering flying saucer to send into the eye of the storm. In this ultimate swap, the Heenes swap lives with a psychic mom who speaks to the dead and can control the weather, her husband and her children -- who believe they are destined to be stars. This show will feature aliens, punk rockers, past-life regression and, for the first time ever, the children from the two families will face off in a kids' table meeting. "Heene/Silver," the 100th episode of "Wife Swap," destined to become a classic, airs FRIDAY, MARCH 13 (8:00-9:00 p.m., ET) on the ABC Television Network.

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CAROL BURNETT TO GUEST STAR ON NBC'S "LAW & ORDER: SPECIAL VICTIMS UNIT" TUESDAY, MARCH 17 10 PM ET/PT

New York, N.Y., February 11th, 2009.          Six-time Emmy Award and five-time Golden Globe Award winner Carol Burnett will guest-star on "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit", Executive Producer Neal Baer announced today. Burnett will guest-star as a former dancer caught up in the murder of a young couple, in the episode titled "Ballerina," premiering Tuesday, March 17th, 10:00p.m. ET/PT on NBC.

"Having Carol Burnett on SVU is a dream come true. When you grow up wanting to be a writer, you can count on one hand the actors you'd give anything to work with. Carol Burnett is my thumb," said Baer.

"Every time I mention to someone that I'm about to work on "Law & Order: SVU", they immediately say 'Oh, that's my favorite show!' I'm so glad that they all share my opinion," Burnett added.

One of America's most beloved and versatile entertainers, Carol Burnett has also been recognized with a Peabody Award and more People's Choice Awards than any other woman in the award show's history. In 2003, she received the Kennedy Center Honors and in 2005 the Presidential Medal of Freedom. Since ending the 11-year run of "The Carol Burnett Show", she has moved easily from the stage to television, from feature films to films for television, and from variety specials to music and comedy specials.

Burnett will next co-star with Michael Keaton in this summer's upcoming feature, "The Post Grad Survival Guide". Recently, she portrayed the villainess Kangaroo in 20th Century Fox's blockbuster animated feature "Dr. Seuss' Horton Hears A Who", with Jim Carrey and Steve Carell.

In television, Burnett starred in the 2005 version of "Once Upon A Mattress" for ABC TV, where she played Queen Aggravain and Tracey Ullman co-starred as Princess Winnifred, the role Carol made famous during its smash Broadway run. The CBS Special "The Carol Burnett Show: Let's Bump Up The Lights", was broadcast in May of 2004 and Carol's previous special, "The Carol Burnett Show: Show Stoppers", was the fourth most watched program of 2001 and was nominated for three Emmy Awards, including Outstanding Variety, Music or Comedy Special. Guest-starring television appearances include "Desperate Housewives" and "Mad About You", for which she won an Outstanding Guest Actress Emmy Award.

Burnett last appeared on Broadway in the 1999 Stephen Sondheim musical review "Putting It Together." Prior to that, she and Philip Bosco both received Best Actor Tony Award nominations in 1995 for their co-starring roles in "Moon Over Buffalo." Burnett and her late daughter, Carrie Hamilton, co-wrote the play "Hollywood Arms," directed by Hal Prince and based on Burnett's 1986 best-selling memoir One More Time. The production made its Broadway debut in 2002.

Burnett is currently working on a second book.

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A SPECIAL EDITION OF 20/20 -- SIEGFRIED & ROY: THE MAGIC RETURNS

New York, N.Y., February 9th, 2009.            Elizabeth Vargas Anchors a Special Edition of "20/20" about the Entertainment Icons and Their Farewell Performance, airing on Friday, March 6 at 9:00 p.m., ET on ABC . A one-night, one-time illusion, for one cause. Siegfried & Roy, whom no one expected to ever see onstage again, are coming back one last time for a night of magic from the Power of Love charity gala benefiting Keep Memory Alive, the foundation for the Lou Ruvo Brain Institute. ABC News will capture their highly-anticipated performance for a special edition of "20/20," "Siegfried & Roy: The Magic Returns," airing on FRIDAY, MARCH 6 (9:00-10:00 p.m., ET) on the ABC Television Network. The one-hour event, anchored by Elizabeth Vargas, will feature exclusive interviews with Siegfried & Roy at their home in Las Vegas, highlights from the duo's unbelievable career and Roy Horn's inspiring recovery, culminating in the performance on February 28, 2009 from the Bellagio Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas.

At last year's Power of Love Gala, Siegfried & Roy surprised the world and announced they would deliver one final performance to benefit Keep Memory Alive, the foundation for the Lou Ruvo Brain Institute. Siegfried & Roy have been iconic entertainment legends for more than 40 years and have not performed since Oct. 3, 2003.

The Lou Ruvo Brain Institute, designed by world-renowned architect Frank Gehry, broke ground on its future site at Union Park in downtown Las Vegas on Feb. 9, 2007. With projected completion by mid-2009, the Lou Ruvo Brain Institute will be the premier research and treatment facility for all chronic brain disorders. Headed by Dr. Zaven Khachaturian, PhD, and supported by internationally acclaimed researchers, the Lou Ruvo Brain Institute will focus on the research and treatment of Alzheimer's, Huntington's, Parkinson's, ALS and memory disorders.

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LET "CUPID" HELP YOU SHARE THE LOVE WITH SPECIAL VALENTINE'S DAY TEXTS FROM YOU OR YOUR LOVED ONES

New York, N.Y., February 9th, 2009.            Do you want to show a loved one you care? Send a message delivered by the God of love, Cupid, that could possibly appear on the New York Times Square Jumbotron!

Sharing the love has never been easier than this Valentine's Day weekend. Beginning Friday, February 13 through Sunday, February 15, "Cupid" could send your Valentine's Day message to loved ones.

Text the word: Cupid + "your message" to 222877. Message must be 70 characters or less. Reply STOP (to end) or HELP (for) more. Standard message charges apply for participating carriers.

The new romantic dramedy, "Cupid," starring Bobby Cannavale ("Will & Grace") as Trevor, Sarah Paulson ("Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip") as Claire, Rick Gomez ("What About Brian") as Felix and Camille Guaty ("Las Vegas") as Lita, makes its series premiere TUESDAY, MARCH 31 (10:02-11:00 p.m., ET) following "Dancing with the Stars" on the ABC Television Network.

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PHIL CAREY ON ABC'S "ONE LIFE TO LIVE," PASSES AWAY

New York, N.Y., February 9th, 2009.            Phil Carey, best known for the role of Asa Buchanan on ABC Daytime's "One Life to Live," passed away at his home in New York City on Friday, February 6, following a courageous battle with lung cancer. He is survived by his beloved wife, Colleen, and their two children, Shannon and Sean, and his three children Lisa, Linda and Jeff from a previous marriage.

Mr. Carey originated the role of "One Life to Live's" formidable business tycoon, Asa Buchanan, in 1980. He was born Eugene Joseph Carey on July 15, 1925 in Hackensack, NJ and raised in the suburban Long Island towns of Rosedale and Malverne. Diagnosed with lung cancer in 2006, he took medical leave from the show to undergo treatment, but returned to the role later that year.

On "One Life to Live," the character of Asa Buchanan died in his sleep on August 16, 2007. The life of Buchanan family patriarch was celebrated on the show's 10,000th episode on August 17, 2007. Mr. Carey made three subsequent appearances on the show, and was last seen when Asa read an addendum to his will on December 29, 2008.

"He was like 'Pa' to me," said his on-screen son Robert S. Woods (Bo Buchanan). "My own father passed away in 1975, and I met Philly in 1979. For those 30 years he has been like a father to me. I don't know if I could love him more if he was my dad."

"In a week where we said goodbye to Clint Ritchie (ex-Clint Buchanan), the overwhelming news of Phil Carey's death was truly a profound loss to the 'One Life to Live' family," said Executive Producer Frank Valentini. "His presence will always be a part of 'One Life to Live.' The best way to describe Phil was bigger than life. Like Asa, he possessed an undeniable quality that drew you to him, whether he was amusing you with a story or he was just plain ornery. We can only imagine that he and Clint Ritchie are sitting back and having a drink together. Our thoughts and prayers go out to his wife, Colleen, and his five children."

"I was incredibly fond of Phil Carey," said "One Life to Live" cast member Erika Slezak. "I loved that man very much. He was larger than life, like his character of Asa. He was a central figure on the show and to everyone at 'One Life to Live.' When Phil was in the building, you knew it. He will be sorely missed. I was so honored to have the privilege to work with him one final time for our 40th Anniversary show."

Mr. Carey was very proud of his service as a U.S. Marine Corporal in World War II and the Korean War. One of the survivors on the U.S.S. Franklin, he was honored with the Asiatic Pacific 9 Stars World War II victory medal after he was wounded in the attack that cost the lives of hundreds of his crewmates and made the Franklin the most heavily damaged carrier to survive the war.

Mr. Carey harbored dreams of being an actor all his life. He studied drama at the University of Miami, but it was back on Long Island where he got his break. During a summer stock production of "Over 21," a representative of Warner Bros. spotted him and asked him to take the screen test that launched his film career. His first feature film, "Operation Pacific," starred John Wayne and led to a long-term contract with Warner Bros. During his time at Warner's and later at Columbia Pictures, Mr. Carey starred with some of Hollywood's legendary actors, including Gary Cooper in "Springfield Rifle," Henry Fonda in "Mister Roberts," Peter Fonda in "Fighting Mad" and Tyrone Power in "The Long Gray Line." In addition he starred with Fred MacMurray and Kim Novak in "Pushover," the first film in which Miss Novak appeared as the leading lady.

Mr. Carey starred in a number of primetime television series such as "Philip Marlowe," "Bengal Lancers," "Laredo" and "The Untamed World," and guest-starred on "All in the Family," "Little House on the Prairie," "Police Woman," "The Bionic Woman" and "Gunsmoke." Additionally he toured in such stage plays as Arthur Miller's "All My Sons" and "Cyrano de Bergerac."

Mr. Carey experienced the world doing what he loved most. His family fondly remembers his countless entertaining stories from exotic locations. One of his favorite anecdotes came after the filming of the television series "Laredo," when he portrayed Granny Goose in the surprisingly popular series of commercials for Granny Goose Potato Chips. In addition he was an avid golfer, and often played with Dean Martin at the Riviera Country Club in Los Angeles. Looking back on Phil Carey's time with Robert S. Woods and Clint Ritchie on "One Life to Live," they undeniably were the Rat Pack of the soap opera world.

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NBC TO AIR NEW LIFE-CHANGING ALTERNATIVE SERIES FEATURING BESTSELLING AUTHOR AND CHANGE EXPERT TONY ROBBINS

Universal City, Ca., February 10th, 2009.            NBC has ordered a new life-changing series starring Tony Robbins whose worldwide work as a peak performance strategist is renowned. The series will feature Robbins guiding participants through complex challenges and personal obstacles, while changing their lives and redesigning their futures. The announcement was made today by Paul Telegdy, Executive Vice President, Alternative Programming, NBC and Universal Media Studios.

"In these tough times, this new series will offer complete life transformations to people who deserve a brand new start, and there's no one better suited to assist people in making positive change happen than Tony Robbins," said Telegdy.

The series is being produced by Reveille, the company behind NBC hit and transformational reality series "The Biggest Loser."

"The opportunity to work with Tony Robbins is a once-in-a-lifetime dream both personally and professionally. Making television shows that will change people's lives for the better is the hallmark of Reveille and now is the time for Tony to help people on a mass broadcast scale," said Howard T. Owens, Managing Director at Reveille. "Tony is a larger-than-life personality, who will deeply touch audiences in his first network television series."

Robbins, who has dedicated himself to giving through both his work and philanthropic endeavors, says the show is designed to inspire people to find the tools to change their own lives, but to also reach out and help others as well.

"At times like these we all have to get stronger for ourselves and for those we love. We really need to find the ways in which each of us can make that little difference that really matters," Robbins said. "It's a privilege to partner with NBC. We look forward to creating a program where the real-life struggles and victories on screen can touch and inspire the larger television audience at home."

Anthony (Tony) Robbins is an international bestselling author, strategist, speaker, philanthropist and advisor to Fortune 500 executives, sports professionals and world leaders, who has worked with influential figures including Mikhail Gorbachev, Princess Diana, Mother Teresa, and President Bill Clinton. Robbins has been honored by Accenture as one of the "Top 50 Business Intellectuals in the World" and as one of the "Top 200 Business Gurus" by Harvard Business Press. He is an internationally recognized personality and has appeared on and hosted numerous television interviews, talk shows, infomercials, and radio programs. Robbins has impacted more than 50 million people in more than 100 countries through his bestselling books, audio programs, training seminars, multimedia and health products. In his debut network series, Robbins and his team will design life-changing techniques and provide participants with transformational skills and tools that can be used to create a more fulfilling and meaningful life.

Robbins is also an active philanthropist. His foundation's annual Basket Brigade now feeds more than 2 million people in 56 countries. For 12 years he personally mentored 20 inner-city youth from grade school to college. More recently, he co-founded a program in Israel and the West Bank that brings young people of all three faiths together in Jerusalem. His nonprofit, "Anthony Robbins Foundation," is focused on helping those often forgotten by society, providing assistance to inner-city youth, senior citizens and the homeless. Robbins' programs have supported more than 2,500 schools and 700 prisons worldwide. The Robbins-Madanes Center for Strategic Intervention collaborates with the University of San Francisco, the Erickson Foundation, the Queen Sofia Foundation, the Juvanteny Foundation in Spain and many other national and international foundations and universities.

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NOMINATIONS ANNOUNCED FOR THE "44TH ANNUAL ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS," TO BE BROADCAST LIVE FROM LAS VEGAS SUNDAY, APRIL 5 ON CBS

Nashville, Tenn., February 10th, 2009.            Nominations for the 44TH ANNUAL ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS, a star-studded event produced for television by dick clark productions, were announced today at a press conference held at the Country Music Hall of Fame and Museum in Nashville. Country superstars Juliana Hough, Kellie Pickler, LeAnn Rimes and Jessica Simpson read the nominations live during CBS's "The Early Show" broadcast. The winners will be broadcast live from Las Vegas' MGM Grand Garden Arena Sunday, April 5 (8:00-11:00 PM, live ET/delayed PT) on the CBS Television Network.

         Brad Paisley led with six nominations, including Entertainer of the Year and Top Male Vocalist. In addition, Paisley was nominated for Single Record of the Year, Song of the Year and Video of the Year for "Waitin' on a Woman," and Vocal Event of the Year for "Start a Band" with Keith Urban. Paisley is the reigning Top Male Vocalist.

         Heidi Newfield is nominated for five awards, including Top Female Vocalist. She is also nominated for Single Record of the Year and as an artist and composer for Song of the Year for "Johnny & June," for which she is also nominated for Video of the Year.

         Kenny Chesney is nominated for four awards, including Entertainer of the Year, Top Male Vocalist and as an artist and producer for Vocal Event of the Year for "Down the Road" with Mac McAnally. If Chesney wins Entertainer of the Year, it will be his fifth consecutive win, which will tie Alabama for the most consecutive wins in this category.

         Jamey Johnson received four nominations, including Top New Male Vocalist, Single Record of the Year and as an artist and composer for Song of the Year for "In Color." This is the first time Johnson has been nominated as an artist. He previously won an Academy of Country Music Award in 2006 for Song of the Year for "Give It Away," which was recorded by George Strait.

         George Strait received four nominations, including Entertainer of the Year, Top Male Vocalist and Song of the Year for "I Saw God Today." He is also nominated for Video of the Year for "Troubadour." If Strait wins Entertainer of the Year, it will be his second win in that category, previously winning the award in 1989. Strait has also been named the Academy of Country Music's Artist of the Decade and will be honored in a television special to air later in the year on CBS.

         Carrie Underwood is nominated for three awards, including Entertainer of Year. If Underwood wins Entertainer of the Year, she will be only the seventh female to take the award; previous winners include Loretta Lynn in 1975, Reba McEntire in 1994 and most recently, Dixie Chicks in 2000. Underwood is also nominated for Top Female Vocalist, and her video, "Just a Dream," is nominated for Video of the Year. If she wins Top Female Vocalist, it will be the third consecutive year she has won the category.

         Keith Urban received three nominations, including Entertainer of the Year, Top Male Vocalist and Vocal Event of the Year for his duet with Brad Paisley for "Start a Band." Urban is a five-time ACM award winner, including Top Male Vocalist in 2004 and 2005, Album of the Year in 2004 and Top New Male Artist in 2000. If he wins Entertainer of the Year, he will be eligible for the Triple Crown Award, the Academy's recognition of those who have taken Top New Artist, Top Artist and Entertainer of the Year awards.

            Trace Adkins, Brooks & Dunn, Little Big Town, James Otto, Jake Owen, Taylor Swift and Sugarland are each nominated for two awards. Adkins is nominated for Single Record of the Year and Song of the Year for "You're Gonna Miss This." Brooks & Dunn are nominated for Top Vocal Duo and Vocal Event of the Year. If they win Top Vocal Duo, it will be their 16th straight win in the category. Little Big Town received two nominations for Top Vocal Group and Vocal Event of the Year. James Otto-a first-time nominee-is nominated for Top New Male Vocalist and as a producer for Song of the Year for "In Color." Jake Owen is nominated for Top New Male Vocalist and Vocal Event of the Year, and was previously nominated for Top New Male Vocalist in 2007. Swift is nominated in two categories including Top Female Vocalist, and her video "Love Story" is nominated for Video of the Year. She won Top New Female Vocalist last year. Sugarland is nominated for Top Vocal Duo and Vocal Event of the Year. Last year they won Single Record of the Year for "Stay."

            For the first time ever, the three newcomer categories for the Annual Academy of Country Music Awards -Top New Female Vocalist, Top New Male Vocalist and Top New Vocal Duo or Group - will be opened up to interactive fan voting on GACTV.com, beginning Friday, Feb. 13. The winners will then move on to compete in a new category, Top New Artist, and for the second year fans will also select the winner of the Academy's most prestigious honor, Entertainer of the Year. Online voting will be available at http://www.voteacm.com/, and this year fans will also be able to text their votes for Entertainer of the Year during the broadcast. The winners of each category will be announced live during the 44TH ANNUAL ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS.

            Members of the Academy of Country Music select the nominees and winners of the ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS, and select the final top five nominees of the Entertainer of the Year category and the top three nominees in newcomer categories, Top New Female Vocalist, Top New Male Vocalist and Top New Vocal Duo or Group. Presenters and performers who will appear at the ceremony will be announced at a later date. As previously announced, Reba McEntire will return for an unprecedented 11th time to host this year's show.

            Following is the list of final nominees. Nominees for Album of the Year will be announced in March. Winners in each of the following categories, except where noted, will be presented with an Academy of Country Music Award during the television broadcast:

Entertainer of the Year

•·   Kenny Chesney

•·   Brad Paisley

•·   George Strait

•·   Keith Urban

•·   Carrie Underwood

Top Male Vocalist

•·   Kenny Chesney

•·   Toby Keith

•·   Brad Paisley

•·   George Strait

•·   Keith Urban

Top Female Vocalist

•·   Miranda Lambert

•·   Heidi Newfield

•·   Taylor Swift

•·   Carrie Underwood

•·   Lee Ann Womack

Top Vocal Group

•·   Lady Antebellum

•·   Little Big Town

•·   Rascal Flatts

•·   Randy Rogers Band

•·   The Lost Trailers

Top Vocal Duo

•·   Big & Rich

•·   Brooks & Dunn

•·   Joey & Rory

•·   Montgomery Gentry

•·   Sugarland

Top New Male Vocalist**

•·   Jamey Johnson

•·   James Otto

•·   Jake Owen

Top New Female Vocalist**

•·   Sarah Buxton

•·   Julianne Hough

•·   Ashton Shepherd

Top New Vocal Duo or Group**

•·   Eli Young Band

•·   The Lost Trailers

•·   Zac Brown Band

Single Record of the Year

[Award to Artist(s)/Producer(s)/Record Company]

•·   Gunpowder & Lead - Miranda Lambert, Produced by Frank Liddell and Mike Wrucke - Columbia

•·   In Color - Jamey Johnson, Produced by The Ken Hardley Playboys - Mercury

•·   Johnny & June - Heidi Newfield, Produced by Tony Brown - Asylum-Curb

•·   Waitin' On A Woman - Brad Paisley, Produced by Frank Rogers - Arista Nashville

•·   You're Gonna Miss This - Trace Adkins, Produced by Frank Rogers - Capitol Nashville

Song of the Year

[Award to Composer(s)/Publisher(s)/Artist(s)]

•· I Saw God Today - George Strait - Composers: Rodney Clawson, Monty Criswell, Wade Kirby

Publishers:   Big Red Toe Music (BMI), Blind Mule Music (BMI), Extremely Loud Music (BMI), Steel Wheels Music (BMI)

•· In Color - Jamey Johnson - Composers: Jamey Johnson, Lee Thomas Miller, James Otto

Publishers: Big Gassed Hitties (BMI), Eldorotto Music Publishing (BMI), EMI Blackwood Music, Inc., Lucky Thumb Music (BMI), New Song of Sea Gayle (BMI), Noah's Little Boat Music (BMI)

•· Johnny & June - Heidi Newfield - Composers: Deanna Bryant, Heidi Newfield, Stephony Smith

Publishers: Amylase Music (ASCAP), Big Hit Makers Music (BMI), Rainy Graham Publishing LLC (BMI), Souljet Music Tell Texas Tune III (ASCAP)

•· Waitin' On A Woman - Brad Paisley - Composers: Don Sampson, Wynn Varble

Publishers: EMI April Music, Inc. (ASCAP), Sea Gayle Music LLC (ASCAP), Warner-Tamerlane Publishing Corp. (BMI)

•· You're Gonna Miss This - Trace Adkins - Composers: Ashley Gorley and Lee Thomas Miller

Publishers: EMI Blackwood Music, Inc. (BMI), Music of Windswept (ASCAP), Noah's Little Boat Music (BMI), Song of Combustion (ASCAP), Songs of Sea Gayle (BMI)

Video of the Year

[Award to Producer(s)/Director(s)/Artist(s)]

•·   Johnny & June - Heidi Newfield -Producer: Karen Martin -Director: Eric Welch

•·   Just A Dream - Carrie Underwood - Producer: Randy Brewer - Director: Roman White

•·   Love Story - Taylor Swift - Producer: Trent Hardville - Director: Trey Fanjoy

•·   Troubadour - George Strait - Producer: Dominic Cancilla - Director: Trey Fanjoy

•·   Waitin' On A Woman - Brad Paisley - Producer: Mark Kalbfeld, Jim Shea - Director: Jim Shea, Peter Tilden

Vocal Event of the Year

[Award to Artist(s)/Producer(s)/Record Company]

•·   Another Try - Josh Turner Featuring Trisha Yearwood - Produced by: Frank Rogers - MCA Nashville

•·   Cowgirls Don't Cry - Brooks & Dunn Featuring Reba McEntire - Produced by: Kix Brooks, Tony Brown, Ronnie Dunn - Arista Nashville

•·   Down The Road - Kenny Chesney With Mac McAnally - Produced by: Buddy Cannon, Kenny Chesney - Blue Chair/BNA

•·   Life In A Northern Town - Sugarland Featuring Little Big Town & Jake Owen - Mercury

•·   Start A Band - Brad Paisley Duet With Keith Urban - Produced by: Frank Rogers - Arista Nashville

            **Fan voting for Top New Male Vocalist, Top New Female Vocalist and Top New Vocal Duo or Group will begin at GACTV.com on Friday, Feb. 13, and will close on Thursday, March 5. The winner in each of the three categories will be announced March 9, and will move on to compete in a brand new Academy of Country Music Awards category, Top New Artist.

            The 44TH Academy of Country Music Awards is dedicated to honoring and showcasing the biggest names and emerging talent in the country music industry. The show is produced for television by dick clark productions. Orly Adelson and R.A. Clark are the executive producers; Barry Adelman the producer and Bob Bardo the executive in charge of production.

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NBC ANNOUNCES COMEDIAN NICK CANNON AS HOST OF 'AMERICA'S GOT TALENT' WHEN HIT TALENT-COMPETITION SERIES RETURNS THIS SUMMER

Universal City, Ca., February 9th, 2009.            Multi-talented entertainer/producer and comedian Nick Cannon will become the new host of NBC's top-rated series "America's Got Talent" when the talent-competition returns next summer, it was announced today by Paul Telegdy, Executive Vice President, Alternative Programming, NBC and Universal Media Studios.

"Nick exemplifies the spirit of 'America's Got Talent' with his talent, originality and an infectious love of performing and creating," said Telegdy. "His popularity and appeal are sure to take the series to a new level of success."

"This is just the first of multiple projects we are looking to do with Nick at NBC," added Ben Silverman, Co-Chairman, NBC and Universal Media Studios. "He's a true triple threat, a multi-talented producer, actor and musician. We are excited to welcome him to the NBC family."

"I'm thrilled to be with working with NBC," said Nick Cannon. "Ben Silverman and Paul Teledgy understand my vision as not only an entertainer but as a creative show producer. I look forward to working with the network and their executive team on 'America's Got Talent' and other shows to come."

"America's Got Talent" will be hosted by Cannon and continue to be presided over by the explosive combination of celebrity judges Sharon Osbourne, Piers Morgan and David Hasselhoff. The series has brought the variety format back to the forefront of American culture by showcasing performers from across the country. For the fourth season, the show will travel to at least nine major cities to find talent of all kinds – singers, dancers, contortionists, comedians, jugglers, magicians and everything in between. They will all strut and perform on-stage hoping to win America's hearts -- and the $1 million prize.

Cited by People Magazine as one of the 'Top Ten most successful young people in Hollywood' and featured on the Cover of Black Enterprises' 40 Under 40, the effusive star has been garnering accolades from all corners of the entertainment community. Cannon landed his first breakthrough role on the Nickelodeon hit series "All That" and was subsequently awarded his own starring vehicle on Nickelodeon, "The Nick Cannon Show." At 16, he became the youngest executive producer on television and won his first kid's choice award for "The Nick Cannon Show," in which he starred, directed and executive produced.

That same year he released his own self-titled debut album, and has collaborated with a host of other musicians, such as Kanye West, The Neptunes, Diddy, Mary J. Blige, Will Smith, R. Kelly and E-40 on soundtracks and other projects. In 2005 he wrote and began hosting, producing and directing his own MTV show, "Nick Cannon Presents Wild'n Out," which became the network's highest rated comedy program for four consecutive seasons. In the Fall 2006, Cannon was featured in the Emilio Esteves' film "Bobby," and his performance earned him a 2007 SAG nomination for "Outstanding Performance by a cast," in addition to becoming the first African-American Actor in history to be honored at the world-renowned Cannes Film Festival with the "Breakthrough Actor of the Year award." In 2008, Nick hosted the Teen Choice Awards for FBC, and most recently was the host/DJ for ABC'shighly successful Presidential Inaugural Neighborhood Ball.

Cannon's other film credits include Sundance Film Festival featured films "Weapons," "American Son," and his most recent role in the psychological thriller, "The Killing Room." He now has his own multi-media company called NCredible, Inc., which has several TV shows and films in development.

Upcoming casting dates include Washington, D.C. (Feb. 13-14), Chicago (March 1-2), Boston (March 7-8), New York City (March 13-15) and Miami (March 28-29). Dates and locations for additional cities including Austin, Texas and Seattle, Washington will be announced in the near future.Contestants are encouraged to pre-register at http://www.nbc.com/AGT. After pre-registering, contestants will be kept up-to-date with the most current information from their audition city.

Locations are as follows:

WASHINGTON, D.C.
Open Call - February 13-14
Gaylord National Resort and Convention Center
201 Waterfront Street
National Harbor, Maryland 20745
(Please do not contact the venue directly)

CHICAGO
Open Call - March 1-2
Location TBD

BOSTON
Open Call – March 7-8
Boston Convention & Exhibition Center
415 Summer Street
Boston

NEW YORK CITY
Open Call - March 13-15
Location TBD

MIAMI
Open Call - March 28-29
Hyatt Regency Miami
400 South East Second Avenue
Miami, FL 33131-2197
(Please do not contact the venue directly)

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DANIEL BARNZ TO DIRECT "BEASTLY" FOR CBS FILMS

New York, N.Y., February 5th, 2009.            Daniel Barnz has signed on to direct "Beastly" for CBS Films, it was announced today by Amy Baer, President and Chief Executive Officer of CBS Films, a division of the CBS Corporation (NYSE: CBS.A and CBS).

Barnz also penned the screenplay for "Beastly," which is based on the novel of the same name by Alex Flinn. Susan Cartsonis is producing the film through her company, Storefront Films. Roz Weisberg is co-producer.

An edgy romance, the story centers on a handsome, yet arrogant, 17 year old who is physically transformed and must find true love to break the curse.

Barnz wrote and directed "Phoebe in Wonderland" which premiered at the 2008 Sundance Film Festival and was nominated for the Grand Jury prize. The film stars Felicity Huffman, Elle Fanning and Patricia Clarkson.

Prior to working on "Phoebe in Wonderland," Barnz was a screenwriter.   He attended Yale University and the University of Southern California Film School.

"Daniel's fresh vision makes him one of the most exciting directors of his generation," says Baer. "We are thrilled to partner with him as he brings his unique voice to arguably the most universally resonant myth in storytelling."

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NBC'S HIT WEIGHT-LOSS SERIES 'THE BIGGEST LOSER' LAUNCHING NATIONWIDE, 14-CITY SEARCH FOR NEW CONTESTANTS AND CERTIFIED TRAINERS

Universal City, Ca., February 9th, 2009.            NBC's popular reality series "The Biggest Loser" is launching a 14-city cross-country search to find new contestants for the next edition of the hit show. Both individuals and teams are encouraged to apply for the new season, which will air in the fall. To keep creative options open for the new season, producers are also looking for certified trainers.

Outgoing and charismatic individuals or teams of two are encouraged to apply, especially those who have the personality, desire and competitive edge to vie for this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to lose weight, change their lives forever and compete for a grand prize of $250,000. Teams can include family members (siblings, cousins, parent and adult child, etc.), spouses, dating or engaged couples, grandparents, co-workers, former teammates or athletes, best friends and college students. Candidates must be at least 18 years of age and legal residents of the United States.

Producers are also looking for certified trainers with strong personalities who have a solid track record of taking the weight off of overweight clients. Nutritional credentials are a plus, and trainers applying must provide references.

While they will try to see everyone, "The Biggest Loser" casting teams will do their best to see the first 500 people in line. People will not be allowed to line up prior to three hours before the start of the open call. Candidates should bring a non-returnable photo of themselves (and their partners if applying as a team).

FEBRUARY 21
NEW YORK CITY
10 am – 5 pm
NBC Experience Store
30 Rockefeller Plaza
New York City, NY 10112

OKLAHOMA CITY
10 am – 5 pm
Toby Keith's I Love This Bar & Grill
310 Johnny Bench Dr
Oklahoma City, OK 73104

LOUISVILLE
10 am – 5 pm
Louisville Athletic Club
(by the Bass Pro Shop)
951 E. Lewis and Clark Parkway
Suite 830
Clarksville, IN 47129

CHICAGO
10 am – 5 pm
NBC Tower
454 N. Columbus Dr.
Chicago, IL 60611

FEBRUARY 28
DALLAS
10 am – 5 pm
Dave and Buster's Stemmons
10727 Composite Drive
Dallas, TX 75220

DETROIT
10 am – 5 pm
Gardner-White Furniture
45300 Hayes Rd.
Macomb, MI 48044

CHARLOTTE
10 am – 5 pm
Fitness Together
1318-E2 Central Ave
Charlotte, NC 28205

NASHVILLE
10 am – 5 pm
Wildhorse Saloon
120 2ND Avenue N
Nashville, TN 37201

MARCH 7
HOUSTON
10am - 5pm
Dave and Buster's
(Marq*E Center off of I-10 & Silber)
7620 Katy Freeway #100
Houston, TX 77024

MIAMI
TBD

COLUMBUS
10 am - 5 pm
Buckeye Hall of Fame Cafe
1421 Olentangy River Rd
Columbus, OH 43212

PHOENIX
10 am - 5 pm
US Airways Center
201 E. Jefferson St
Phoenix, AZ 85004

MARCH 14
LOS ANGELES
TBD

SAN DIEGO
TBD

For those who are unable to attend a casting call, information on how to apply to the show as a contestant or trainer is available on www.nbc.com/casting.

Alison Sweeney ("Days of Our Lives") is the host of the series, which challenges and encourages overweight contestants to shed pounds in a safe and recommended manner through comprehensive diet and exercise as they compete for a grand prize of $250,000. The unscripted and life-altering series gathers contestants from across the country to face real-life temptations, while being provided with approved weight-loss skills and resources in an effort to help them transform their bodies, health -- and ultimately -- their lives. Contestants work out under the supervision of professional trainers Bob Harper and Jillian Michaels.

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ANNA PAQUIN STARS IN "THE COURAGEOUS HEART OF IRENA SENDLER," A NEW "HALLMARK HALL OF FAME" PRESENTATION FOR AIR SUNDAY, APRIL 19 ON CBS

New York, N.Y., February 11th, 2009.          Academy Award and Golden Globe Award winner Anna Paquin ("The Piano," "True Blood") stars in THE COURAGEOUS HEART OF IRENA SENDLER, a new "Hallmark Hall of Fame" presentation to be broadcast Sunday, April 19 (9:00-11:00 PM, ET/PT) on the CBS Television Network. The drama is based on the courageous true story of Nobel Peace Prize nominee Irena Sendler (Paquin), who is credited with saving the lives of 2,500 Jewish children during World War II.  Academy Award winner and nominee Marcia Gay Harden ("Pollock," "Mystic River"), Nathaniel Parker ("The Inspector Lynley Mysteries") and Goran Visnjic ("ER") also star. Harden plays Sendler's mother, Janina, and Parker portrays Dr. Majkowski, the head of Warsaw's Department of Health who helped Sendler obtain important resources for her mission. Visnjic plays Stefan, a former university friend of Sendler who was Jewish and with whom she fell in love when she started her clandestine work in the Warsaw ghetto.

            As a Polish Catholic social worker in the early 1940s, Irena Sendler created and led a conspiracy of women who moved in and out of Warsaw's Jewish Ghetto disguised as nurses employed by Warsaw's Health Department.  Though they worked under the guise of merely attempting to prevent and contain the spread of Typhus and Spotted Fever, Sendler and her brave cohorts emerged each time with the children of consenting Jewish parents.  The children were sometimes sedated and hidden inside boxes, suitcases and coffins as a means of rescuing them from their imminent deportation to death camps.  They were given new identities and placed with Polish families and in convents.  Sendler kept a hidden record of their birth names and where they were placed with the hope that they would some day be reunited with their own families.

             In 1943, the Nazis discovered Sendler's daring and dangerous ruse and arrested her.  She was tortured by Gestapo agents and suffered broken feet.  On the day of her scheduled execution she was rescued by "Zegota," the underground network with which she worked to save the Jewish children.

          As a result of Sendler's efforts, approximately 2,500 children were smuggled to safety.  Not a single child she rescued was ever betrayed or discovered by the Nazis.

         The movie is based on the authorized biography of the heroine, Mother of the Children of the Holocaust: The Irena Sendler Story, by Anna Mieszkowska, published in 2005.

          In 2007 Sendler was nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize.  That same year, Hallmark Hall of Fame acquired exclusive movie rights to the book and negotiated life-rights with Sendler and her family members.  Sendler died on May 12, 2008 at the age of 98.

            Anna Paquin won an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress at age 11 for her role in "The Piano."   Her additional film credits include her recurring role as Rogue in "X-Men" and its two sequels, as well as roles in "The Squid and the Whale," "25^th Hour," "Buffalo Soldiers," "Finding Forester," "Almost Famous," "Hurlyburly," "She's All That," "A Walk on the Moon," "Amistad," "All the Rage," "Fly Away Home," Franco Zeffirelli's "Jane Eyre" and "Blue State."   Paquin's television credits include a lead role in the series "True Blood," for which she recently won a Golden Globe Award, and an Emmy nominated role in the movie "Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee." Among her theater credits are her stage debut in "The Glory of Living" at New York's MCC Theater, for which she received a Drama Desk nomination as Best Lead Actress.   She was also in the first West End production of "This Is Our Youth."

             Marcia Gay Harden won an Academy Award as Best Supporting Actress for her role in "Pollock." Among her additional film credits are "Mystic River," for which she earned an Academy Award nomination, "Miller's Crossing," "The First Wives Club," "Meet Joe Black," "Mona Lisa Smile," "The Hoax," "Into the Wild," "American Gun" and "Used People." Harden's television credits include her current lead role in the series "Damages," a lead role in the Network series "The Education of Max Bickford," an Emmy nominated guest-starring role on "Law & Order: SVU," a role as Ava Gardner in the CBS mini-series "Sinatra" and a role in the "Hallmark Hall of Fame" presentation "In From the Night," also on the Network. Her theater credits include "Angels in America," for which she earned a Tony Award nomination and won the Drama Desk Award.

            Nathaniel Parker's television credits include the title role in the BBC series "The Inspector Lynley Mysteries," which has had a 23 episode run between 2002 and 2007, the title role in the mini-series "David" and a starring role in the BBC mini-series "Bleak House." Among his film credits are "Hamlet," "The Bodyguard," "Stardust," "Beverly Hills Ninja," "The Haunted Mansion," "Flawless" and "War Requiem." Parker joined the Royal Shakespeare Company in 1986 and appeared in several of their productions, including "Richard II" and "A Midsummer Night's Dream." Subsequent West End stage credits include David Mamet's "Speed-the-Plow" as well as a recent U.K. touring production of Simon Gray's "Quartermaine's Terms."

              Goran Visnjic is well-known for his role as Dr. Luka Kovac on the series "ER." He also starred in the mini-series "Spartacus."   His film credits include "Elektra," "The Deep End," "Committed," "Practical Magic," "Welcome to Sarajevo" and "Rounders." His upcoming films include "Helen," which premiered at the 2009 Sundance Film Festival, and the anthology film "New York, I Love You."

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LISTINGS FOR NBC'S 'SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE'

February 14 – Alec Baldwin/ Jonas Brothers

February 21 - Hugh Laurie / Kanye West (OAD 12/13/08)

February 28 - Neil Patrick Harris / Taylor Swift (OAD 1/10/09)

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UPCOMING GUESTS ON THE "LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN"

Thursday, Feb. 12                Musicians The Jonas Brothers; sportscaster Chris Russo; musicians Ashford & Simpson

Friday, Feb. 13                        Style guru Martha Stewart; comedian Jake Johannsen; musical guest Matt Nathanson

*Monday, Feb. 16                  Actress Ellen Pompeo; Daytona 500 winner; musical guests Willie Nelson with Asleep at the Wheel

Tuesday, Feb. 17                     Actress/talk show host Bonnie Hunt; musical guest M. Ward

Wednesday, Feb. 18                Real estate mogul Donald Trump; musical guests Antony and the Johnsons

Thursday, Feb. 19                    Actor David Spade from the CBS comedy series "Rules of Engagement"; musical guests David Sanborn with Sam Moore

Friday, Feb. 20                        Journalist Barbara Walters

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UPCOMING GUESTS ON "THE LATE LATE SHOW with CRAIG FERGUSON"

Thursday, Feb. 12                    Comedian Lewis Black; actress Shirley Manson

Friday, Feb. 13                        Actor Tom Selleck; music by Glen Campbell

*Monday, Feb. 16                  Actor David Boreanaz; actor Philip Johnson; music by Zac Brown Band

Tuesday, Feb. 17                  Host/comedian Bill Maher; actor Chris Klein

Wednesday, Feb. 18            Musician Wynonna; editor/writer Peter Bart

Thursday, Feb. 19                Judge/musician Paula Abdul; NASCAR driver Carl Edwards

Friday, Feb. 20                     Actress Rosie O'Donnell; music by The Knux

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LISTINGS FOR 'LAST CALL WITH CARSON DALY'

Thursday, February 12 – 973 Jai Al-Attas/Tom Moon with musical guest The Sounds

Friday, February 13 – 960 Billie Piper/Jerome Flood II with musical guest Flobots

Monday, February 16 – 961 Derek Luke with musical guest Puddle of Mudd

Tuesday, February 17 – 974 Musical guest Lykke Li

Wednesday, February 18 – 975 TBD

Thursday, February 19 – 976 Musical guest Ludacris featuring Piles

Friday, February 20 – 977 TBD

Monday, February 23 – 932 Mark Sawyer with musical guest Unwritten Law

Tuesday, February 24 – 963 Kat Von D/Ben Kronberg with musical guest LMFAO

Wednesday, February 25 – 964 Matt Ryan with musical guest Ida Maria

Thursday, February 26 – 965 Steve Knopper with musical guest Company of Thieves

Friday, February 27 – 967 Kevin Hart with musical guest Yelle

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QUOTABLES FROM 'SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE'S' 'WEEKEND UPDATE WITH SETH MEYERS'

FEBRUARY 7, 2009

"WEEKEND UPDATE" ANCHOR SETH MEYERS - "On Friday the Senate agreed to an economic stimulus package of at least 780 billion dollars which, I know sounds like a lot of money, but remember that's in American dollars."

MEYERS - "In a statement released Friday, Republican Senator James Inhofe said the economic recovery bill is 93 percent spending and 7 percent stimulation. Which, coincidently, is the exact same formula used to bring Nancy Pelosi to orgasm."

MEYERS - "After two of his top cabinet nominees withdrew their bids on Tuesday because of their failure to pay back taxes, President Obama said, "This was a mistake. I screwed up." That's your mistake? I don't know if you remember, but the last guy broke the world."

MEYERS - "At a Groundhog ceremony at the Staten Island Zoo Monday, New York Mayor Mike Bloomberg was bitten on the finger by the groundhog. Which means 6 more weeks of winter for us, and 6 pounds of fresh groundhog meat for the zoo's lion."

MEYERS - "Olympic gold medalist Michael Phelps apologized Sunday after pictures were printed of him smoking marijuana from a bong last fall. Though suddenly the Michael Phelps diet makes a lot more sense."

MEYERS - "Julie and Hillary Goodridge, a lesbian couple who led the fight for gay marriage in Massachusetts, filed for divorce this week. Citing irreconcilable blazers."

MEYERS - "This month is Black History Month. Not to be confused with A & E's Black Mystery Month."

MEYERS - "Doctors in Maryland are hoping that an operation they performed in which they removed a donor's kidney through her vagina will encourage others to donate as well. Though I fail to see how "We'll pull it out through your vagina" sweetens the deal."

MEYERS - "An increasing number of rare animals, such as snakes and monkeys, are being used by Mexican gangs to help smuggle drugs into the US. Because nothing helps you blend in like a monkey full of cocaine."

MEYERS - "An estimated 90,000 sex offenders have been identified and removed from MySpace this week. So to those sex offenders I say, welcome to Facebook!"

MEYERS - "According to new research, marinating steak in beer or wine before grilling reduces the amount of carcinogens in the meat. "Well that's certainly going to make my breakfast healthier," said John Madden."

MEYERS - "A man in Colorado robbed two convenience stores armed with a "bat'leth," which is a curved sword used by Klingons in Star Trek. As for what exactly the man was stealing, I think it's safe to say 'not condoms.'"

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THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Messages Left on Alex Rodriguez's Answering Machine"

As presented on the Monday, Feb. 9 broadcast of the LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN

10.       "Hey, it's Mark McGwire. Want to get together this week and not talk about the past?"

9.         "Joe Torre here - thanks for helping book sales."

8.         "Could you find a steroid that keeps you from choking in the playoffs?"

7.         "Are you worried that this will taint all the championships you didn't win?"

6.         "Hi, it's Bernie Madoff. Nice try, but I'm still the most hated man in New York."

5.         "Michael Phelps here. Got any snacks?"

4.         "Hi, this is Sammy Sosa. Just pretend you don't speak English."

3.         "Michael Phelps again. Did I call you or did you call me?"

2.         "Hey, it's Rod Blagojevich - I'll say you're innocent, if you say I am."

1.         "It's Madonna. You got a phone number for Jeter?"

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THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Reasons I'm Looking Forward to the Grammy Awards"

As presented by rap star Lil' Wayne, who leads the field with eight nominations at this Sunday's Grammy Awards, on the Thursday, Feb. 5 broadcast of the LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN

10.       By thanking family and friends on air, I can save money on my long-distance calls.

9.         In the course of the evening, I'm hoping to marry and divorce Amy Winehouse.

8.         I'm nominated in the category of "Lillest Wayne."

7.         I get to hang with the Jonas Brothers. Have you seen those guys? They're adorable.

6.         Watching Madonna ask for the senior citizen's discount at the bar.

5.         The US Airways pilot is gonna land a plane on the stage.

4.         The green room crabcakes are in the shape of Beyonce's booty.

3.         It'll be more exciting than my usual Sunday night of watching "Desperate Housewives" in my underpants.

2.         In these tough times, Americans will appreciate the chance to watch a bunch of rich people kiss each other's asses for three hours.

1.         Winners who talk too much get tased.

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THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Michael Phelps Excuses"

As presented on the Tuesday, Feb. 3 broadcast of the LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN

10.       Anxious to rid myself of those bothersome billion-dollar endorsements.

9.         Too much chlorine.

8.         Uh...I thought it was chapstick.

7.         Asked myself, "What would Chong do?"

6.         Uh...glaucoma?

5.         It's my last chance to goof off before I have to settle down and get a real swimming job.

4.         Uh...I got bitten by a groundhog?

3.         Chillax, broseph.

2.         Was doing research for upcoming film "Michael and Kumar Go to the Olympics."

1.         Huh?

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