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Headlines & Links For Thursday, April 9th, 2009.

“AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL” RETURNS TO NEW YORK CITY FOR OPEN CASTING CALL ON SAT., APRIL 11 (Read More)

“SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE” STAR ANIL KAPOOR JOINS SEASON EIGHT CAST OF “24” (Read More)

THE CW ANNOUNCES TWO REALITY SERIES PREMIERES FOR SUMMER 2009       (Read More)

ABC'S LOST WINS PEABODY AWARD       (Read More)

MEKHI PHIFER TO GUEST-STAR ON “LIE TO ME” BEGINNING WEDNESDAY, MAY 6, ON FOX       (Read More)

CBS's "BIG BROTHER 11" ANNOUNCES A SERIES OF OPEN CASTING CALLS IN VARIOUS CITIES ACROSS AMERICA       (Read More)

UNLEASH MORE OF YOUR YELLOW WITH “THE SIMPSONS” VIDEO CONTEST       (Read More)

BACKSTABBING, LAZINESS AND A SURPRISE TASK TAKES A TOLL ON THE REMAINING NINE CELEBRITIES ON THE NEXT 'CELEBRITY APPRENTICE' SUNDAY, APRIL 12 (9-11 P.M. ET) ON NBC       (Read More)

NEW DATING COMPETITION “MORE TO LOVE” PREMIERES TUESDAY, JULY 28, ON FOX       (Read More)

FOX TO PREMIERE "MENTAL", A NEW ONE HOUR MEDICAL DRAMA, MAY 29TH.       (Read More)

DON’T FORGET THE LYRICS! RETURNS TO FOX FRIDAY, MAY 22.           (Read More)

'TODAY' CONCERT SERIES - SUMMER 2009           (Read More)

CW TO BROADCAST DAYTIME EMMYS           (Read More)

HFPA ANNOUNCES TIMETABLE FOR "THE 67th ANNUAL GOLDEN GLOBE AWARDS"           (Read More)

“HOUSE” CHARACTER DR. LAWRENCE KUTNER DIES           (Read More)

ABC NEWS' HOPKINS WINS PEABODY AWARD           (Read More)

NBC CAPTURES 28 SPORTS EMMY AWARD NOMINATIONS           (Read More)

ZAC EFRON AND MUSICAL GUEST YEAH YEAH YEAHS MAKE THEIR SNL DEBUT ON APRIL 11           (Read More)

UPCOMING GUESTS ON THE "LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN"           (Read More)

UPCOMING GUESTS ON "THE LATE LATE SHOW with CRAIG FERGUSON"           (Read More)

LISTINGS FOR 'LATE NIGHT WITH JIMMY FALLON'           (Read More)

LISTINGS FOR "LAST CALL WITH CARSON DALY"           (Read More)

QUOTABLES FROM 'SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE'S' 'WEEKEND UPDATE WITH SETH MEYERS' APRIL 4, 2009           (Read More)

QUOTABLES FROM 'LATE NIGHT WITH JIMMY FALLON' March 30 – April 3           (Read More)

THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Signs Your Kid Is In Al-Qaeda"           (Read More)

THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Little-Known Facts About Queen Elizabeth II"           (Read More)

“AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL” RETURNS TO NEW YORK CITY FOR OPEN CASTING CALL ON SATURDAY, APRIL 11

New York, N.Y., April 6th, 2009.                AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL returns to New York City on Saturday, April 11 to hold one final open call for Cycle 13. As previously announced, females age 18 to 27, of diverse backgrounds, shapes, sizes and with a height requirement of 5’7” and under are eligible to audition.

Confirmed location will be posted to http://www.cwtv.com/thecw/topmodel-cycle13-Casting later this week.

Audition Rules and Guidelines:

1. No lining up overnight and no lining up prior to 6:00am. Registration will begin at 7:00am. These times may be amended at Producer’s discretion.

2. Proof of age is required to enter the line. Acceptable identification must include picture and birth date.

3. Colors of wristbands indicate when your scheduled audition time will be. If your scheduled audition time is several hours or more from the time that you receive your wristband, then we encourage you to leave and come back.

4. Only women applying should stand in line. If someone is just short of being 18, she can have one guardian with her. Please note that you must turn 18 by April 15, 2009 to audition.

5. Please make sure that you have everything you need to audition before you get into any line (for wristbands, etc.). You will only be allowed one bag that can fit comfortably on your lap inside the venue. This will be enforced by security.

6. No jumping in line or holding places in advance for others but it’s okay if you’re going to the restroom or getting food and water. You’re not guaranteed to be allowed back in line. Be courteous to others around you.

7. Casting staff will give special instructions for the disabled.

8. Once in the venue, no ins and outs.

9. Only one audition per open call – do not try again if you’ve been cut.

10. Casting staff wearing official ANTM gear outside the venue may ask you for information in advance but be careful who you talk to and avoid anyone trying to charge you anything to participate.

11. We reserve the right to change or add to these rules as needed.

AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL is produced by 10 by 10 Entertainment in association with Bankable Productions. Tyra Banks is the creator and executive producer along with Ken Mok (“Making the Band”) and Daniel Soiseth (“Hell’s Kitchen”).

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“SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE” STAR ANIL KAPOOR JOINS SEASON EIGHT CAST OF “24”

Los Angeles, Ca., April 3rd, 2009.               Ticking toward the emotional conclusion of its critically acclaimed seventh season, 24 is preparing for a new day by casting Anil Kapoor (“Slumdog Millionaire”) to star as a series regular during Season Eight. In his first American television role, Kapoor will play a Middle Eastern leader who comes to the U.S. on a peacemaking mission.

With more than 100 credits to his name, Kapoor is a Bollywood icon and one of India’s most prominent actors. He has earned acclaim for his many award-winning performances over the last three decades, and recently appeared as game show host “Prem Kumar” in the Oscar-winning film “Slumdog Millionaire.”

Kapoor joins a long list of award-winning and distinguished actors who have appeared in the Emmy Award-winning series starring Kiefer Sutherland, including Academy Award winner Jon Voight; Tony Award winner Cherry Jones; Emmy Award winners Peter MacNicol, Jean Smart, Chad Lowe and Powers Boothe; Golden Globe nominees Dennis Haysbert and William Devane; and Academy Award nominees Sean Astin, Shohreh Aghdashloo, Peter Weller, James Cromwell and Dennis Hopper.

The nonstop seventh season continues Monday, April 6 (9:00-10:00 PM ET/PT) when the FBI braces for a standoff with Starkwood, a private military firm helmed by mastermind Jonas Hodges (guest star Jon Voight). After Jack’s recent exposure to the lethal pathogen, emotions boil over as his health worsens. Meanwhile, conniving First Daughter Olivia Taylor (guest star Sprague Grayden) accepts the desperate measures necessary to prevent further panic within the administration. Season Seven’s climactic finale will air as a special two-hour television event Monday, May 18 (8:00-10:00 PM ET/PT) on FOX.

Created by Joel Surnow and Robert Cochran, 24 is a production of Real Time Productions and Imagine Television in association with 20^th Century Fox Television. Howard Gordon, Evan Katz, Jon Cassar, Manny Coto, David Fury, Kiefer Sutherland and Brian Grazer serve as executive producers.

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THE CW ANNOUNCES TWO REALITY SERIES PREMIERES FOR SUMMER 2009

Los Angeles, Ca., April 6th, 2009.               The CW announced today that it will launch two original series for the summer: the reality relationship series HITCHED OR DITCHED and the docu-series set in Washington, D.C., BLONDE CHARITY MAFIA.

“We’re very excited to be launching original programming during the summer months for the first time,” said Dawn Ostroff, president, entertainment, The CW. “We want to keep this season’s momentum going by freshening our schedule with two new reality shows with fun, relatable concepts aimed squarely at our young female demo.”

HITCHED OR DITCHED premieres Tuesday, May 26 (9:00-10:00 p.m. ET), following the season finale of REAPER (8:00-9:00 p.m. ET). Encore presentations will air Wednesdays (9:00-10:00 p.m. ET), beginning May 27. The six-episode run will continue until the season finale on June 30.

The half-hour episodes of BLONDE CHARITY MAFIA will premiere with two back-to-back episodes on Tuesday, July 7 (9:00-9:30 and 9:30-10:00 p.m. ET). Beginning July 14, an encore of the previous week’s episode will air at 9:00 p.m., followed by an original episode at 9:30 p.m. The six episodes will conclude with a season finale on August 4.

HITCHED OR DITCHED is a one-hour reality show focusing on couples who are in long-term relationships but have not yet taken that big leap into marriage. Nominated by a friend who believes it’s either time for the couple to tie to the knot or break up, each episode features a different couple who accept their friend’s proposition to set a wedding date in one week’s time. Throughout the week leading up to the big day, the couple is put through a series of personalized exercises that test their relationship, all while planning their dream wedding. They may have to confront their problems ranging from mending relationships with future in-laws to dealing with jealousy issues. When the wedding day arrives, the couple will make the final decision – will they tie the knot or call the whole thing off? Viewers will witness every emotional milestone as the couple decides if it’s time to get HITCHED OR DITCHED. The series is hosted by Tanya McQueen (“Extreme Make-Over Home Edition”). HITCHED OR DITCHED is produced by RDF USA in association with Next Entertainment. The executive producers are Mike Fleiss (“The Bachelor,” “High School Reunion”), Chris Coelen (“Secret Millionaire,” “Don’t Forget the Lyrics”), Greg Goldman (“Secret Millionaire,” “Wife Swap”), Mike Duffy (“Addicted to Beauty”) and Jason Ehrlich (“The Bachelor”).

BLONDE CHARITY MAFIA is a docu-series about the lives of Washington, D.C.’s most influential 20-something Alpha Girls. The BCM runs the D.C. social circuit from charity events to society parties. Their events are the hottest ticket in town, and everyone vies for an invitation – from Congressmen to Hill staffers. Gossip about the BCM is played out and played up on LATENIGHTSHOTS.com (a local, invite-only social website), where minute-by-minute gossip updates about the BCM’s daily (and nightly) exploits are shared for the D.C. public to devour.

BLONDE CHARITY MAFIA is from Capital Hills Productions, Inc. with executive producers Patty Ivins (“The Modern Girl’s Guide To Life,” “Sports Illustrated: Swimsuit Model Search”) and Julie Pizzi (“The Modern Girl’s Guide To Life,” “Sports Illustrated: Swimsuit Model Search”).

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ABC'S LOST WINS PEABODY AWARD

New York, N.Y., April 1st, 2009.               ABC's "Lost" has won a Peabody Award, the University of Georgia's Grady College of Journalism and Mass Communication announced today. The Peabody Board, who made the selections, said the winners represent "the best in electronic media for 2008."

After Oceanic Air flight 815 tore apart in mid-air and crashed on a Pacific island, its survivors were forced to find inner strength they never knew they had in order to survive. But they discovered that the island holds many secrets, including a mysterious smoke monster, polar bears, housing and hatches with electricity and hot & cold running water, a group of island residents known as "The Others," and a mysterious man named Jacob. The survivors have also found signs of those who came to the island before them, including a 19th century sailing ship called The Black Rock, a downed Beechcraft plane from a failed drug run, the remains of an ancient statue, as well as bunkers belonging to the Dharma Initiative -- a group of scientific researchers who inhabited the island in the recent past. They also encountered a freighter stationed off the island that some thought would lead to their rescue, but ultimately almost caused their extinction. The band of friends, family, enemies and strangers must continue to work together against all odds if they want to stay alive. But as they have discovered during their journey, nothing is what it seems, and danger and mystery loom behind every corner, with even those they thought could be trusted turning against them. Even heroes have secrets.

"Lost" stars Naveen Andrews as Sayid, Henry Ian Cusick as Desmond, Jeremy Davies as Daniel Faraday, Michael Emerson as Ben, Matthew Fox as Jack, Jorge Garcia as Hurley, Josh Holloway as Sawyer, Daniel Dae Kim as Jin, Yunjin Kim as Sun, Ken Leung as Miles, Evangeline Lilly as Kate, Elizabeth Mitchell as Juliet and Terry O'Quinn as Locke.

"Lost" was created by Jeffrey Lieber and J.J. Abrams & Damon Lindelof. Abrams, Lindelof, Bryan Burk, Jack Bender, Edward Kitsis, Adam Horowitz and Carlton Cuse serve as executive producers. "Lost," which is filmed entirely on location in Hawaii and premiered on September 22, 2004, is from ABC Studios.

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MEKHI PHIFER TO GUEST-STAR ON “LIE TO ME” BEGINNING WEDNESDAY, MAY 6, ON FOX

Los Angeles, Ca., April 2nd, 2009.               Mekhi Phifer is set to guest-star on LIE TO ME in a two-episode arc starting Wednesday, May 6 (8:00-9:00 PM ET/PT) on FOX. Phifer, who begins production today, will play Ben Reynolds, an FBI agent who partners with Lightman to track down a serial rapist terrorizing the Washington, DC area. In the season’s second to last episode, Reynolds, having spent the last six months pursuing the elusive criminal, assists The Lightman Group in solving their toughest case yet.

Perhaps best known for his starring role on “ER,” which garned him two NAACP Image Award nominations, Phifer is also known for his many successful feature films. He began his acting career in Spike Lee’s “Clockers” and then went on to star in such films as “8 Mile” opposite Eminem, “O” opposite Josh Hartnett and Julia Stiles as well as “Soul Food” with Vanessa Williams. Phifer’s other television credits include “The Tuskegee Airmen,” “Subway Stories: Tales from the Underground,” “Brian’s Song” and “Carmen: A Hip Hopera.” Phifer earned an additional NAACP Image Award nomination for the cable film “A Lesson Before Dying.”

LIE TO ME, the No. 1 new series of the season among Adults 18-49, stars Tim Roth as Dr. Cal Lightman, the world’s leading deception expert who studies facial expressions and involuntary body language to discover not only if someone is lying, but why. Based on the real-life scientific discoveries of Dr. Paul Ekman, the series follows Lightman and his team of deception experts as they assist law enforcement and government agencies to expose the truth behind the lies.

Samuel Baum, Brian Grazer, David Nevins and Steven Maeda serve as executive producers on the series, which is produced by Imagine Television and 20^th Century Fox Television.

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CBS's "BIG BROTHER 11" ANNOUNCES A SERIES OF OPEN CASTING CALLS IN VARIOUS CITIES ACROSS AMERICA

New York, N.Y., April 3rd, 2009.               BIG BROTHER 11, to air this summer on the CBS Television Network, announces a series of open casting in various cities across America. BIG BROTHER 11 will follow a group of people who will be living together in a house outfitted with dozens of cameras and microphones as their every move is recorded 24 hours a day. Each week, the Houseguests will vote someone out of the house. At the end, the last remaining Houseguests will win the grand prize of $500,000.

            Interested applicants must be at least 21 years of age and a citizen of the United States. A full list of eligibility requirements can be found at www.cbs.com/casting.

            The following are the list of cities participating in BIG BROTHER 11 open casting calls:

THURSDAY, APRIL 2: 7:00 - 10:00 PM ET

Republic
828 South Peters Street

New Orleans, La. 70130

SATURDAY, APRIL 4: 11:00 AM - 1:00 PM ET

Bealls Department Store (Oakleaf Crossing)
8396 Merchants Way

Jacksonville, Fla. 32222

SATURDAY, APRIL 4: 12:00 - 6:00 PM ET

Rock Bottom Restaurant & Brewery
3242 Peachtree Road

Atlanta, Ga. 30305

SATURDAY, APRIL 4: 10:00 AM - 2:00 PM ET

Carolina Kia Hyundai
2445 N. Main Street

High Point, N.C. 27262

SATURDAY, APRIL 4 - 12:00 PM - 6:00 PM CT

Rock Bottom Restaurant & Brewery
1 W Grand Avenue

Chicago, Ill. 60654

SATURDAY, APRIL 4: 1:00 - 4:00 PM CT

Antonelli College
2323 Lakeland Drive

Flowood, Miss. 39232

SATURDAY, APRIL 4: 10:00 AM - 2:00 PM MT

The W Sports and Wellness Center
Wartburg College

100 Wartburg Blvd.

Waverly, Iowa 50677

SATURDAY, APRIL 4:   4:00 to 8:00 PM CT

McFadden's
134 Second Avenue, North.

Nashville, Tenn. 37201

SATURDAY, APRIL 4: 11:00 AM - 3:00 PM ET

The Paradise Rock Club
967 Commonwealth Avenue

Boston, Mass. 02215

SATURDAY, APRIL 4: 12:00 - 4:00 PM ET

Fair Grounds Race Course & Slots

1751 Gentilly Blvd.

New Orleans, La. 70119

SATURDAY, APRIL 4: 12:00 - 6:00 PM ET

Rock Bottom Brewery

3242 Peachtree Road NE

Atlanta, Ga. 30305

SUNDAY, APRIL 5: BEGINNING AT 12:00 NOON ET

Roy Arias Studios
300 W. 43rd St. 3rd Fl. Suite 301/A

New York, N.Y. 10036

SUNDAY, APRIL 5: 1:00 - 4:00 PM CT

Primetime Lounge
104 W. Main Street

Louisville, Ky. 40202

TUESDAY, APRIL 7: 4:00 - 7:00 PM CT

LifeStyles Furniture

3735 Avenue of the Cities

Moline, Ill. 61265

THURSDAY, APRIL 9: 6:30 - 8:30 PM CT

Shooters North

7742 Forest Hills Rd.

Loves Park, Ill.

THURSDAY, APRIL 9: 2:00 - 8:00 PM CT (Registration ends at 6pm)

Mall of Abilene

4310 Buffalo Gap Road

Abilene, Texas 79606

FRIDAY, APRIL 10: 12:00 - 3:00 PM ET

CBS-3 Studios

1555 Hamilton Street

Philadelphia, Penn. 19130

SATURDAY, APRIL 11: 5:00 - 9:00 PM CT

Aces Lounge

222 East 6th Street

Austin, Texas 78701

SATURDAY, APRIL 11: 5:00 - 9:00 PM ET

Cans Bar & Canteen

500 W 5th St

Charlotte, N.C. 28202

SATURDAY, APRIL 11: 12:00 - 6:00 PM ET

Beef 'O' Brady's

10029 W. Hillsborough Avenue

Tampa, Fla. 33615

SATURDAY, APRIL 11: 11:00 AM - 5:00 PM ET

Buckeye Hall of Fame Café

1421 Olentangy River Rd.

Columbus, Ohio 43212

SATURDAY, APRIL 11: 2:00 - 6:00 PM PT

Dos Gringos Chandler Mexigrill

1361 N Alma School Rd.

Chandler, Ariz. 85224

TUESDAY, APRIL 14: 2:00 - 7:00 PM ET

Fibber McGees Irish Restaurant & Pub

1610 Pavilion Place

Wilmington, N.C. 28403

SATURDAY, APRIL 18: 1:00 - 4:00 PM MT

Chapman Dodge

3175 East Sahara

Las Vegas, Nev. 89104

SATURDAY, APRIL 18: 1:00 - 4:00 PM MT

Chapman Chrysler Jeep

930 Auto Show Dr.

Henderson, Nev. 89104

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UNLEASH MORE OF YOUR YELLOW WITH “THE SIMPSONS” VIDEO CONTEST

Los Angeles, Ca., April 6th, 2009.               FOX and MySpace invite fans to continue to “Unleash Your Yellow” and celebrate 20 years of television’s favorite family with THE SIMPSONS Video Contest. Based on the iconic couch gag from THE SIMPSONS opening credits, fans are encouraged to create live-action videos of their own original couch gags and upload them to THE SIMPSONS MySpace page at myspace.com/thesimpsons.

Beginning today, fans 18 years and over will have the opportunity to submit and share their “Best. Couch Gag. Ever.” live-action videos. On June 22, 2009, two winners – one grand prize winner chosen by a judging panel including THE SIMPSONS producers and one fan favorite chosen based on MySpace fan ratings – will be announced and may be featured online. The deadline for submissions is 11:59 PM ET on Monday, May 18, 2009. Official rules and more information can be found at myspace.com/thesimpsons.

The grand prize winner will receive a trip to Los Angeles to attend THE SIMPSONS 21^st season premiere party, a Sony Home Entertainment System and a custom SIMPSONS drawing. The fan favorite winner will receive a SIMPSONS prize package.

As the video contest kicks-off, THE SIMPSONS Poster Contest culminates today with the online reveal of three grand prize winners: Andy Baker of Centerville, OH, James King of Windsor, CO and Lena Samol of Mount Washington, KY. The three lucky winners will receive a trip to Los Angeles to attend THE SIMPSONS 21^st season premiere party as well as tickets to “The Simpsons Ride” at Universal Studios Hollywood. Additionally, the grand prize winning artwork, which may be incorporated into the series’ fall 2009 marketing campaign, can now be viewed at thesimpsons.com.

“Best. 20 Years. Ever.,” a year-long global celebration honoring all things THE SIMPSONS, launched in January 2009 and will culminate on January 14, 2010, the 20^th anniversary of the series’ debut.

Now the longest-running comedy in television history, THE SIMPSONS immediately struck a chord with viewers across the country as it poked fun of itself and everything in its wake. With its subversive humor and delightful wit, the series has made an indelible imprint on American pop culture, and the family members have become television icons.



THE SIMPSONS is a Gracie Films Production in association with 20^th Century Fox Television. James L. Brooks, Matt Groening, and Al Jean are the executive producers. Film Roman is the animation house.

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BACKSTABBING, LAZINESS AND A SURPRISE TASK TAKES A TOLL ON THE REMAINING NINE CELEBRITIES ON THE NEXT 'CELEBRITY APPRENTICE' SUNDAY, APRIL 12 (9-11 P.M. ET) ON NBC

New York, N.Y., April 6th, 2009.               After the surprising firing of Tionne Watkins and Khloe Kardashian in last week's boardroom, teams Athena and Kotu must recover quickly and get to work on an in-store display for LifeLock this Sunday, April 12 (9-11 p.m. ET) on NBC. The LifeLock challenge, however, is just the beginning for the celebrities as Mr. Trump has another task for both teams before they even have a chance to register who was fired in the boardroom.

To begin, the teams must design and build an in-store display unit and packaging for the company of LifeLock, which provides identity theft protection. Team Kotu, led by pro-golfer Natalie Gulbis, delegates various responsiblities to her team quickly and ignores the obvious tension between team members Joan Rivers and Clint Black. A lackluster Brian McKnight, whose slow pace has the team close to missing deadlines and Jesse James working through an illness, leads team Athena. Both teams present their displays to the CEO of LifeLock and the last-minute decisions made by each team have the executive choosing a clear winner and Mr. Trump firing another celebrity. Before the teams have a chance to wind down, however, Mr. Trump calls them immediately back into the boardroom to begin their next task, auctioning jewelry from Ivanka Trump's boutique for a charity later that night. The teams swiftly get to work but the backstabbing that took place between celebrities in the boardroom affects certain members during the task, and one celebrity feels shunned by their team. A sabotage against one team puts tens of thousands of dollars up for grabs, and a surprise guest star agrees to keep an eye on the feuding celebrities for Trump.

Clint Black, Annie Duke, Natalie Gulbis, Jesse James, Brian McKnight, Joan Rivers, Melissa Rivers, Brande Roderick and Herschel Walker are the remaining nine celebrities vying to be The Celebrity Apprentice.

"The Celebrity Apprentice" is produced by Mark Burnett Productions in association with Trump Productions LLC. Mark Burnett, Donald Trump, Page Feldman and Eden Gaha are Executive Producers.

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NEW DATING COMPETITION “MORE TO LOVE” PREMIERES TUESDAY, JULY 28, ON FOX

Los Angeles, Ca., April 6th, 2009.                MORE TO LOVE, the inspirational new dating competition out to prove that love comes in all shapes and sizes, is set to premiere Tuesday, July 28 (9:00-10:00 PM ET/PT) on FOX. Executive-produced by Mike Fleiss (“The Bachelor,” “The Bachelorette”), the unscripted series follows a single average guy with a big waist and an even bigger heart as he romances several confident and secure plus-size women. As the competition narrows, he will have to decide if one full-figured lady has what it takes to become his true love.

The series is currently casting for interested plus-sized women, as well as a husky hunk, ready for the romantic adventure of a lifetime. Eligible women can apply online at moretolovecasting.com. Additionally, open casting calls will be held exclusively at Lane Bryant stores in select cities across the country as follows:

Cities Dates/Times Locations

Raleigh/Durham, NC Wednesday, April 8 Renaissance Village

4:00-8:00 PM 8200 Renaissance Pkwy.

Durham, NC 27713

Edison, NJ Friday, April 10 Menlo Park Mall

2:00-6:00 PM 100 Menlo Park

Edison, NJ 08837

Houston, TX Saturday, April 11 The Woodlands Mall

2:00-6:00 PM 1201 Lake Woodlands Dr.

The Woodlands, TX 77380

Philadelphia, PA Thursday, April 16 King of Prussia Mall

4:00-8:00 PM 160 N. Gulph Rd.

King of Prussia, PA 19406

New York, NY Saturday, April 18 380 Fulton St.

Noon-6:00 PM Brooklyn, NY 11201

Dallas, TX Saturday, April 18 Park Lane Center

2:00-6:00 PM 8070 Park Lane

Dallas, TX 75231

Los Angeles, CA Saturday, April 18 TBD

Noon-6:00 PM

Eligible men can apply online at https://kasstinginc.com/applications/moretolove.php or attend one of the following casting events:

Cities Dates/Times Locations

Dallas, TX Monday, April 6 Primo’s Bar & Grill

5:00-8:00 PM 3309 McKinney Ave.

Dallas, TX 75204

Chicago, IL Friday, April 10 Rock Bottom Restaurant

6:00-9:00 PM One W. Grand Ave.

Chicago, IL 60610

Miami, FL Friday, April 10 Tarpon Bend

5:00-8:00 PM 200 SW 2^nd St.

Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301

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FOX TO PREMIERE "MENTAL", A NEW ONE HOUR MEDICAL DRAMA, MAY 29TH.

Los Angeles, Ca., April 6th, 2009.                FOX’s summer slate continues to grow with the new medical drama MENTAL now premiering Friday, May 29 (9:00-10:00 PM ET/PT). MENTAL follows Dr. Jack Gallagher (Chris Vance), a dynamic, young psychiatrist who serves as Director of Mental Health Services at a Los Angeles hospital. At work he must reconcile his effective, yet highly unorthodox treatment methods with his conservative boss, hospital administrator Nora Skoff (Annabella Sciorra), a woman with whom he shares a romantic past.

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DON’T FORGET THE LYRICS! RETURNS TO FOX FRIDAY, MAY 22.

Los Angeles, Ca., April 6th, 2009.                The new season of DON’T FORGET THE LYRICS! will premiere Friday, May 22 (8:00-9:00 PM ET/PT) on FOX.]

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'TODAY' CONCERT SERIES - SUMMER 2009

New York, N.Y., April 2nd, 2009.               For its 14th consecutive year, NBC's "Today" is bringing together the biggest, boldest names in music to rock the Plaza. This year's "Toyota Concert Series on Today" kicks off with a special comeback performance by Grammy Award-winning rock band No Doubt, Friday, May 1. No Doubt has been on a multi-year hiatus, and the innovative band's "Today" performance marks the group's first concert together in five years. The live concert will also mark their first-ever "Today" performance.

The "Toyota Concert Series on Today" continues its tradition of bringing "Today" viewers the hottest hit-making artists in the industry. This year's concert series also features special performances by Dave Matthews Band and Kings of Leon, both bands' first morning television concerts. America's favorite morning program will also feature surprise guest performers throughout the series.

Following is a list of concerts scheduled to date. All concerts are Friday performances.

MAY

1 No Doubt
8 New Kids On The Block & Special Guest
15 Jennifer Hudson
22 Fall Out Boy
29 Taylor Swift

JUNE

5 The Dave Matthews Band
12 Black Eyed Peas
19 Jonas Brothers
26 The Fray

JULY

3 Rob Thomas
10 Rascal Flatts
17 The All American Rejects
24 Katy Perry
31 Kings of Leon

AUGUST

7 Jason Mraz
14 Flo Rida
21 Natasha Bedingfield
28 TBA

Additional performances will be announced throughout the season.

Fans and visitors are encouraged to join us on the plaza for the live performances. Viewing is on a first-come, first-served basis outside "Today's" Window on the World Studio, located at 49th Street and Rockefeller Plaza in New York City.

Jim Bell is the executive producer of "Today" (Monday-Friday, 7-10 a.m.). Melissa Lonner is the senior producer responsible for the "Toyota Concert Series on Today."

Toyota partners with NBC's "Today" show for the seventh consecutive year. Toyota established operations in the United States in 1957 and currently operates ten manufacturing plants. There are more than 1,400 Toyota, Lexus and Scion dealerships in the U.S. that sell more than 2.2 million vehicles a year. Toyota directly employs over 34,000 in the U.S. and its investment here is currently valued at more than $17 billion, including sales and manufacturing operations, research and development, financial services and design.

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CW TO BROADCAST DAYTIME EMMYS

Los Angeles, Ca., April 8th, 2009.              The CW will broadcast the Daytime Emmys this year, it has just been announced.

“We’re pleased to have this prestigious franchise on our network,” said Dawn Ostroff, President, Entertainment, The CW in a statement. “It is not only a terrifically entertaining show with a core female following similar to our own, but will also give us a promotional platform as we launch our Fall 2009 schedule.”

The show, broadcast live on Sunday, August 30, honors daytime dramas and syndicated programs, and this year includes a Lifetime Achievement Award for Sesame Street. The complete list of nominees will be released on May 14, 2009.

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HFPA ANNOUNCES TIMETABLE FOR "THE 67th ANNUAL GOLDEN GLOBE AWARDS"

Hollywood, Ca., April 2nd, 2009.               Jorge Camara, President of the Hollywood Foreign Press Association, announced the timetable for "The 67th Annual Golden Globe Awards" to be broadcast in HD Sunday, January 17, 2010 from 5-8 PM (PST) and 8-11 PM (EST) live from The Beverly Hilton on NBC.

"In this age when news is disseminated with increasing rapidity, the Hollywood Foreign Press Association is delighted to announce that this year's Golden Globe Awards telecast will be aired live nationwide," said Camara. "For the first time, viewers on the west coast will see the winners announced at the same time as the rest of the country, with no tape delay."

Key dates for the Golden Globe Awards timetable are as follows:

October 30, 2009 Final date for press conferences for Television entries
Friday

November 6, 2009 Deadline for submission of Golden Globe entry forms
Friday

November, 2009 Cecil B. DeMille Award/Miss Golden Globe Announcement
(Exact date TBA)

December 3, 2009 Deadline for nomination ballots to be mailed by Ernst &
Thursday Young to all HFPA members

December 9, 2009 Final screening date for Motion Pictures
Wednesday

December 10, 2009 Final date for Motion Picture press conferences
Thursday

December 11, 2009 Deadline for receipt by Ernst & Young of
Friday nomination ballots

December 15, 2009 5:00 a.m. Nomination Announcement of "The 67th
Tuesday Annual Golden Globe Awards"

December 18, 2009 Deadline for receipt of media credential applications
Friday

December 28, 2009 Final ballots mailed by Ernst & Young to all HFPA members
Monday

January 6, 2010 Deadline for receipt of publicist credential applications
Wednesday

January 13, 2010 Deadline for receipt by Ernst & Young of final ballots
Wednesday

January 17, 2010 Presentation of "The 67th Annual Golden Globe Awards"
Sunday Live telecast on NBC at 5 PM PST and 8 PM EST

"The 67th Annual Golden Globe Awards" will be seen in more than 160 countries worldwide and is one of the few awards ceremonies that span both television and motion picture achievements. The special will be produced by Dick Clark Productions in association with the Hollywood Foreign Press Association.

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“HOUSE” CHARACTER DR. LAWRENCE KUTNER DIES

Los Angeles, Ca., April 7th, 2009.                FOX has launched a special online memorial at HYPERLINK "http://www.fox.com/kutner"fox.com/kutner to give viewers an opportunity to remember “Dr. Lawrence Kutner” (Kal Penn), whose unexpected suicide occurred on last night’s episode of HOUSE.

Features of the site include a video tribute to Kutner featuring music composed by Hugh Laurie, Kutner’s obituary, messages posted by Princeton Plainsboro coworkers and a link to the Kutner memorial Facebook page. On the Facebook page, fans have the opportunity to leave personal messages remembering the character, view photos, video clips, as well as “grab” his hospital ID to post on social networking sites and their personal blogs.

Additionally, the HOUSE homepage at HYPERLINK "http://www.fox.com/house"fox.com/house will have a new look in observance of this somber storyline.

HOUSE supports the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), and in conjunction with the show’s support, fans can purchase a “House-ism” t-shirt (with proceeds benefiting NAMI) at HYPERLINK "http://www.housecharitytees.com/"housecharitytees.com or HYPERLINK "http://www.nami.org/"nami.org. For information about mental health issues or for more information about NAMI, please visit HYPERLINK "http://www.nami.org/"nami.org.

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ABC NEWS' HOPKINS WINS PEABODY AWARD

New York, N.Y., April 1st, 2009.               ABC News won a Peabody Award for the documentary series "Hopkins," the University of Georgia's Grady College of Journalism and Mass Communication announced today. The Peabody Board, who made the selections, said the winners represent "the best in electronic media for 2008."

Nearly eight years after the critically acclaimed series, "Hopkins 24/7," ABC News returned to Baltimore's Johns Hopkins Hospital for a new seven-part documentary entitled "Hopkins," which delved even deeper into the world of caregivers at this hospital. Hopkins offered a rare look at the impact this high pressure profession can have on doctors' personal lives. For four months, ABC News' high definition cameras had unparalleled access to this legendary hospital and to more than a hundred caregivers and patients who gave their consent to be filmed. Hopkins captured astounding scenes of medical crisis, with young doctors forced to make life and death decisions on the fly. The result was a stunningly intimate portrait of the men and women who called this hospital home. Hopkins premiered Thursday, June 26, 2008.

Terence Wrong was producer and executive producer. Brad Hebert and Alex Piper were supervising producers. Rudy Bednar was senior executive producer.

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NBC CAPTURES 28 SPORTS EMMY AWARD NOMINATIONS

New York, N.Y., April 2nd, 2009,               NBC Sports received 28 Sports Emmy Award nominations, including Outstanding Live Event Turnaround for the network's coverage of the Beijing Olympic Games; Outstanding Live Sports Series for "NBC Sunday Night Football;" Outstanding Live Sports Special for coverage of the 108th U.S. Open Championship and The Championships, Wimbledon – The Gentleman's Final; Outstanding Studio Show – Weekly for "Football Night in America"; and nominations for Bob Costas, Al Michaels, John Madden, Cris Collinsworth, Dan Hicks, Johnny Miller and Mike Emrick in individual talent categories; it was announced today by the National Academy of Television Arts & Sciences. NBC Sports received 12 nominations in all for its coverage of the Beijing Olympic Games and four for its NFL coverage. The winners will be announced by the Academy April 27 in New York City.

At that ceremony, Dick Ebersol, Chairman, NBC Universal Sports & Olympics, will receive this year's Lifetime Achievement Award. He is a winner of 24 Sports Emmy Awards and has previously received the National Academy of Television Arts & Sciences Trustees Award.

Ebersol, who has led NBC Sports for 20 years, is renowned for his ability to amass large television audiences. Most recently, Ebersol architected two record-breaking television events: The Beijing Olympic Games, the most watched event in U.S. history, and Super Bowl XLIII, which delivered the largest single audience. Remarkably, he has now produced seven of the top ten most-watched events of all time.

Ebersol is recognized as a creative producer and a skilled promoter. Under his leadership, NBC Sports has come to represent superior production that elevates sport, broad promotion and mutually beneficial partnerships.

This announcement comes just one day after NBC Sports received its first ever Peabody Award for coverage of the Beijing Olympics Opening Ceremony.

OLYMPIC NOMINATIONS OF NOTE:

· Outstanding Live Event Turnaround

· Outstanding New Approaches Sports Event Coverage: NBCOlympics.com

· George Wensel Technical Achievement Award: NBC's Three Screen Olympics

· Outstanding Open/Tease

NBC SPORTS NOMINATIONS OF NOTE:

· Outstanding Live Sports Special: 108th U.S. Open Championship, The Championships, Wimbledon – Gentleman's Final

· Outstanding Live Sports Series: "NBC Sunday Night Football"

· Outstanding Studio Show – Weekly: "Football Night in America"

· Outstanding Edited Sports Special: 2008 Beijing Paralympics; 2008 Ford Ironman World Championship

· Outstanding Sports Promotional Announcement – Episodic: 2009 Winter Classic, "NBC Sunday Night Football," Kick-off Weekend – Manning Brothers

NBC SPORTS TALENT NOMINATIONS:

· Outstanding Sports Personality, Studio Host: Bob Costas

· Outstanding Sports Personality, Play-by-Play: Al Michaels, Dan Hicks, Mike Emrick

· Outstanding Sports Personality, Sports Event Analyst: John Madden, Chris Collinsworth, Johnny Miller

· Outstanding Sports Personality, Studio Analyst: Cris Collinsworth

Other categories in which NBC earned Emmy nominations (some categories received multiple nominations): Technical Team Remote, Technical Team Studio, Camerawork, Editing, Music Composition/Direction/Lyrics, Live Event Audio/Sound, Graphic Design, and Innovative Technical Achievement.

SPORTS EMMY NOMINATIONS BY NETWORK:

ESPN 42
NBC 28
FOX 18
HBO 18
Turner 14
FSN 12
CBS 11
NFL 10
* Source: National Academy of Television Arts & Sciences

A complete list of nominees is available at www.emmyonline.org.

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ZAC EFRON AND MUSICAL GUEST YEAH YEAH YEAHS MAKE THEIR SNL DEBUT ON APRIL 11

New York, N.Y., April 4th, 2009.               Superstar Zac Efron will host "Saturday Night Live" April 11, alongside musical guest Yeah Yeah Yeahs.

Zac Efron, who will make his "SNL" hosting debut, is one of Hollywood's young breakout stars. He stars in the film "17 Again," which opens in theaters April 17. Zac gained recognition as the star of the Emmy Award-winning phenomenon "High School Musical" and reprised his role in "High School Musical 2," which broke cable TV records as it garnered 17.5 million viewers. His recent film sensation "High School Musical 3: Senior Year," set a box office record for the highest grossing opening weekend for a musical. Zac also starred alongside an all-star cast in last summer's box office smash "Hairspray." Efron was awarded an MTV Movie Award for Breakthrough Performance in the film, which also garnered the Critics Choice award for Best Ensemble. The "Hairspray" cast was also nominated for Golden Globe and SAG Awards. Efron can be seen starring with Claire Danes in "Me and Orson Welles" later this year.

Also making their "SNL" debut, Yeah Yeah Yeahs will perform from their newest album "It's Blitz!" The album earned "4 stars" from Rolling Stone Magazine and Spin Magazine calls it "the alternative pop album of the decade." Yeah Yeah Yeahs released their debut studio album "Fever To Tell" in 2003 and followed with "Show Your Bones" in 2006. Rolling Stone called "Show Your Bones" a "textural triumph" and was rated one of the Top 50 albums of 2006 by the magazine, as well as one of the Top 40 albums of 2006 by Spin Magazine. The band has also gained recognition in the digital world as their song "Maps" is a playable track in the music video game "Rock Band."

"Saturday Night Live" is from SNL Studios in association with Broadway Video. The creator and executive producer is Lorne Michaels. Steve Higgins and Marci Klein are producers. Ken Aymong is supervising producer. Seth Meyers is head writer. Don Roy King directs.

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UPCOMING GUESTS ON THE "LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN"

Thursday, April 9                      Actor Russell Brand; animal expert Jack Hanna

Friday, April 10                        Talk show host/comedian Jon Stewart; musical guest U2

Monday, April 13                     Actor Alec Baldwin; actor Zac Efron

Tuesday, April 14                 Talk show host/actress Kelly Ripa; musical guests Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Wednesday, April 15                Actress Drew Barrymore; author Bill Scheft; musical guest Neko Case

Thursday, April 16                    Actor Matthew Perry; actress Elisha Cuthbert; musical guests Rascal Flatts

Friday, April 17                    Actor Russell Crowe; musical guests A.C. Newman with Nicole Atkins

Monday, April 20                 Actor Jeff Goldblum; ventriloquist Jeff Dunham

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LISTINGS FOR 'LATE NIGHT WITH JIMMY FALLON'

Thursday, April 9 – Show 0017 – Guests include Rachel Maddow, John Cena, and musical guest Gabriella Cilmi

Friday, April 10 – Show 0010 – Guests include Tracy Morgan, Jarod Miller's Animals, and musical guest Trace Adkins

Monday, April 13 – Show 0026 – Guests include Denis Leary, Jill Hennessy, and musical guest Sara Watkins & John Paul Jones

Tuesday, April 14 – Show 0027 – Guests include musical guest Akon

Wednesday, April 15 – Show 0028 – Guests include Ice-T (NBC's "Law and Order: Special Victims Unit"), Elmo, and musical guest Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Thursday, April 16 – Show 0029 – Guests include Rachel McAdams and Matthew Stafford

Friday, April 17 – Show 0030 – Guests include Matthew Perry and musical guest Plain White T's

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UPCOMING GUESTS ON "THE LATE LATE SHOW with CRAIG FERGUSON"

Thursday, April 9                 Actor Robin Williams; magician Jason Randal

Friday, April 10                        Actress Brittany Murphy; actor Christopher Gorham from the CBS drama series "Harper's Island"

Monday, April 13                 Musician Dwight Yoakam; actress Mary McCormack

Tuesday, April 14                 Actor Adam Goldberg; actress Anna Gunn; music by Brett Dennen

Wednesday, April 15           Actor Michael Caine; comedian Matt Baetz

Thursday, April 16               Former US Secretary of State Madeleine Albright; actress Amy Smart

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LISTINGS FOR "LAST CALL WITH CARSON DALY"

Thursday, April 9 –987 Tom Green with musical guest Mishka

Friday, April 10 –988 Josh Flitter with musical guest Kid Cudi

Monday, April 13 –990 Masi Oka with musical guest The Duke Spirit

Tuesday, April 14 –999 Adele

Wednesday, April 15 –1000 The Duke Spirit

Thursday, April 16 –1001 Lykke Li

Friday, April 17 –1002 Ben Harper & Relentless7

Monday, April 20 –994 Jack & Kelly Osbourne with musical guest Ben Harper & Relentless7

Tuesday, April 21 –1003 Brett Dennen

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QUOTABLES FROM 'SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE'S' 'WEEKEND UPDATE WITH SETH MEYERS' APRIL 4, 2009

"WEEKEND UPDATE" ANCHOR SETH MEYERS - "This week, President Obama attended what was either the G-20 summit or his high school reunion. I haven't seen old white dudes this excited to meet a black guy since Michael Jordan's Fantasy Camp."

MEYERS - "After First Lady Michelle Obama was photographed in London this week wearing clothes from J. Crew, the store has been selling out of the clothes she was seen wearing. Now if someone could just get her to drive a Chrysler."

MEYERS - "Indian car maker Tata motors, has unveiled the world's cheapest car, which sells for 2000 dollars. The Tata is not the world's most attractive car, but they look better when you push two of them together."

MEYERS - "When President Obama met with England's Queen Elizabeth he presented her with an Ipod loaded with Broadway song, while she gave the Obamas a silver-framed photo of herself and Prince Phillip. So congratulations on having no winners in that gift exchange. When I think of things an 83 year old super rich British woman would want an Ipod is pretty far down the list, right between "bus pass" and "sneakers with wheels on the bottom," and when I think of things a 47 year old super cool black man would want a picture of an 83 year-old superrich British lady is dead last. You both have to step it up. Obama --- first DVDs for the Prime Minister and now this. I'm not saying it's easy buying a gift for the queen. She wears the same outfit everyday and her only hobby is waving. But if you're looking for gift ideas for foreign leaders maybe check with the state department and not Sasha and Malia. This is an audience with the Queen of England, not the third night of Hanukkah. And while we're at it, Queen of England, a picture of yourself is not a good gift. It's like saying, "if you liked having this quiet awkward exchange with me, imagine if it never ended." In short, let's remember you're world leaders not secret santas."

MEYERS - "Three boys in southwest Michigan, who were looking for old bottles, discovered a bone from a mammoth. So they made a bong out of that instead."

MEYERS - "A government study has found that traces of a chemical used in rocket fuel were found in samples of powdered baby formula, and could exceed what is considered a safe dose. On the upside, flying babies!"

MEYERS - "Suspended NFL star Michael Vick told a bankruptcy court on Friday that his time in prison has given him a chance to think and he realized that he "can't live like the old Mike Vick." Mostly because that guy lives in prison."

MEYERS - "It was reported this week that a man who was proposing to his girlfriend on the Brooklyn Bridge dropped the ring, causing it to fall to the road below. The story has a happy ending though - - the man didn't have to get engaged."

MEYERS - "The Rotary Club in Oakdale, California this week held its annual Testicle Festival, where people dined on 400 pounds of bull testicles. Said one bull, 'Please feel free to play with your food.'"

MEYERS - "New York Mayor Mike Bloomberg on Thursday praised the Reverend Al Sharpton calling him a "calming influence on the city." Wow. What are the odds of a city having two reverends named Al Sharpton?"

MEYERS - "It has been rumored that during his first concert in London this summer, Michael Jackson's son Prince Michael the first, will make a surprise appearance on stage. Where it's expected he will point to his dad and tell the police officer accompanying him, 'That's the guy.'"

MEYERS - "A man in West Virginia sank two consecutive holes-in-one this week. Said the man's wife, 'Oh, is that a lot?'"

MEYERS - "A couple in New York State were arrested this week after their two children showed up at their elementary school high on marijuana. A teacher became suspicious when the kids' show and tell topic was 'my amazing hand.'"

MEYERS - "A New York businessman is launching a new kosher tequila in time for Cinco de Mayo. "Finally," said Pablo Goldberg."

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QUOTABLES FROM 'LATE NIGHT WITH JIMMY FALLON' March 30 – April 3

"Barack Obama is taking on his first overseas trip as President tomorrow. He is headed to the G20 Economic Summit – and has been rehearsing his opening line to foreign leaders… "Hi, I'm not George Bush.""

"Did you hear this? Some guy is selling a video of Joe Biden's daughter snorting cocaine. I'm not really interested. If I want to see video of a rambling, incoherent Biden, I'll just turn on CNN."
Biden said he's so angry, he could literally pull his hair-plugs out. He's just so mad"

"Environmentalists said this weekend's Earth hour was a huge success when over an estimated 1 billion people turned off their lights, tv's, and appliances from 8:30-9:30. What's interesting is that during this hour, NBC's ratings actually went up."

"FoxNews launched a new editorial website today that is based solely on reporters' opinions, not the facts of the stories themselves. They're calling the site FoxNews."

"A new study finds that 80% of Americans are afraid of visiting the dentist. 20% are just afraid of Highlights Magazine. I mean I still have nightmares about Goofus and Gallant."

"Skype, the service that allows free phone calls over the Internet, will be available on iPhones beginning this week. Finally… someone's discovered how to make phone calls… on a phone."

"On 60 minutes, Lebron James casually sunk a half-court shot underhand. Later on - Morley Safer delivered a perfect no-look pass of a kidney stone."

"Finally Tiger Woods, after 8 months of rest, he was rehabbing his knee, came from behind to win the Arnold Palmer Invitational with a 16-foot putt on the final hole. I was so excited I jumped up off my couch and screamed why am I watching golf?"

"A Jet Blue baggage handler fell asleep in the luggage compartment of a plane and was accidentally flown from New York to Boston. It sounds bad, but Jet Blue was just thrilled that anything in its luggage compartment made it to its destination."

"A man in Ohio was charged with drunk driving after crashing a "vehicle" that he made out of a bar stool and a lawn mower. I say this with all seriousness, friends don't let friends drive a bar stool mounted on a lawn mower. That's the one thing I've always said."

"A scientific study revealed that the ideal running speed for a healthy workout is 8.5 mph. Americans everywhere are disappointed that this doesn't match THEIR ideal running speed of sitting down."

"Today, Salt Lake International Airport introduced a new X-ray machine that can see underneath your clothing. Security officials say this is necessary to make sure no passengers smuggle on their dignity."

"And finally, in Florida, a man threw a Molotov Cocktail at his neighbor's home, but he missed and ended up burning down a trailer, two cars, and a pick-up truck. Wow. I had no idea Brett Farve lived in Florida."

"It was a big day in London. President Obama met Queen Elizabeth. He and Michelle went to Buckingham Palace. It was very nice. And he gave the Queen an iPod with forty Broadway songs loaded on it. Someone needs to tell Barack – not all Queens like show tunes."

"You remember how Oprah Winfrey opened a school in Africa a while back? Which is great. I love Oprah Winfrey. Well, seven students there were punished for violating the code of conduct. When she heard about it, Oprah said she was "very disssaaapoooOOOINNTTTTEEDD!!" "

"After being on the air for 72 years, CBS is canceling the soap opera Guiding Light. 72 years! It started back on radio. It's a great show. But fans of the show shouldn't worry. Soap operas don't die, they go into a coma – and come back as another actress."

"Here in New York a museum will display over two hundred brooches that belonged to former Secretary of State Madeleine Albright. It'll be part of a new exhibit called, "Why Kids Hate Museums.""

"You know that new X-Men movie "Wolverine" that's coming out this summer? The FBI is investigating how an HD version was leaked on-line. And as soon as the FBI solves it, they'll get back to looking for Bin Laden.

"Finally - after 15 years - NBC aired the last episode of ER. In the final episode, George Clooney tries to remember the names of his old cast-mates."

"The new Yankee stadium opened yesterday. It looks incredible. But even Hal Steinbrenner, the team President, admitted that some of the seats are over priced. Especially the part of the dugout where A-Rod sits."

"Reporters dialing in to a State Department conference call with Hillary Clinton yesterday and were accidentally connected to a phone sex line. Which is just another way of saying Bill picked up."

"The Taliban has decided to modernize a little bit. They will stop measuring the length of mens' beards. That's a big step for those guys. I'm proud of those guys. Couldn't be happier. Oh wait I know how I could be happier - if they stopped trying to murder us."

"I've never heard of this but tomorrow is World Pillow Fight Day, and people everywhere are actually into this stuff. Any women who want to participate should meet up tomorrow - in the imaginations of teenage boys everywhere."

"Police investigators in Indiana say they found the recipe for making crystal-meth in the pages of the Bible. Police are looking for Matthew, Mark, Luke, and Skeeter."

"A cereal company in Oregon had to recall its entire line because the customer service number on the boxes accidentally belonged to a phone sex line. It did give them a new idea for a cereal though – Get Lucky Charms, Frosted Mini Teets, Honey Bunches of Sluts, Really Fruity Pebbles, Cream of Meat, and one they didn't even change Grape Nuts."

"And finally, the movie, "Adventureland" comes out this weekend. It's about an amusement park in the 80s where kids would hang out, get drunk, and hook up ... in the 90s they changed the name to Neverland Ranch."

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THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Signs Your Kid Is In Al-Qaeda"

As presented on the Friday, April 3 broadcast of the LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN

10.       His name: Mike Jenkins - now goes by Mike Bin Jenkins.

9.         Runs inside for cover whenever a satellite flies overhead.

8.         His chemistry tutor? Chemical Ali.

7.         If he doesn't like what's for dinner, he throws a shoe at you.

6.         On invitation to his birthday party, he wrote "no Kurds."

5.         Hides in his room and communicates through randomly-released audiotaped messages.

4.         Yearbook declares him "most likely to defeat the American jackals in the name of Allah."

3.         Asks to go to sleepaway camp in Peshawar, Pakistan.

2.         Happiest day of his life: when Ayman Al Zawahiri showed up at his Bar Mitzvah.

1.         Instead of Hannah Montana, he has a crush on Pooja Fallujah.

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THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Little-Known Facts About Queen Elizabeth II"

As presented on the Thursday, April 2 broadcast of the LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN

10.       From 1978 to 1980, was the center square on "Hollywood Squares."

9.         Holds weekly talks with her United States counterpart, Queen Latifah.

8.         On Facebook, lists her romantic status as "it's complicated"

7.         Her middle name: "Beyonce"

6.         Worked her way up to Queen after starting in Buckingham Palace mailroom.

5.         Throws left, bats right.

4.         Considered a master of the five-fingered clawhammer banjo technique.

3.         Takes her afternoon tea with two sugar cubes and a splash of malt liquor.

2.         Constantly walking up to horses and saying, "Charles?"

1.         Sold iPod Obama gave her for a quick three bills.

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